Be yourself.
Be yourself! This is the worst advice I’ve ever received. Yourself is going to have problems. Actually? Everyone has problems, and if you’re unfortunate enough to have problems so bad that no one likes you, then you get even more damaging advice. People tell you that you have to change now. That you have to be better.
You can’t change who you are. Now don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot about ourselves we can improve. You can learn how to live a healthier life, cope with, and ultimately manage your problems in a way that doesn’t make you want to commit suicide, but ultimately it’s what you can’t change that people judge you for.
For example, if you have a mental illness. Say, depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, you name it. There’s many kinds of typically trauma induced conditions. Sometimes you’re just born that way though. All of these don’t just go away. They’re here to stay no matter what you do. They’re a quirk, a unique trait you have that explains the way you think. Still don’t believe me? Here’s another example, if you have an IQ of 100 which is perfectly average, you can’t just train to have an IQ over 130 becoming a genius. It doesn’t work like that.
There’s many more examples of these limitations we all have making us who we are. The unchanging reality that must be endured. So you shouldn’t be yourself because that’s an issue for people. You’re not good enough. Yet you also can’t really change because that’s not possible. You have limits. People will tell you to do one of these two things and they’re wrong. So what can you do? You have to make the most of what you are. You’ll find this is most of life. Discovering what you can’t change and therefore learning how to make the most of it.
Life is not something to accept as it is. Nor is it something to change. There’s a third option that people don’t seem to understand. It’s taking everything that currently is, and adding to it. No! Don’t modify it and make it something else. No! Don’t look at the facts and say that’s all there is. Add to it. I’m asking you to create something here. Don’t corrupt with a judgment on what it is and therefore what it must be. These are only part of the picture no matter how accurate that detail may be.
There’s a wonderful bigger picture you’re slowly creating over time even if where you currently are is considered problematic. I hate the term “mental illness”. There’s nothing wrong with you like the world would have you believe when they’re trying to sell you something. You simply don’t have enough added to you yet.
Why is it that we love kids and try to add everything positive we can to them but we forget that adults need this too? We don’t look at a child struggling and say, “look at everything wrong with you”. We try to teach them. Yet we look at adults who were never taught and that’s exactly what we say to them. We say, ”you have so much wrong with you”. It’s heartbreaking.
You’re not sick in the head. You’re a beautiful human being and I wouldn’t have you become anything else. You just need some additions. The right ones. Everyone has the ability to create these. You don’t need to be an artist for that. You simply need to make value in what is. Not what isn’t. Life is meaningless, and this is why you can’t be happy with things as they are, but you also can’t make it become meaningful either. All you can do is see it as more after you give it meaning.
I’m not going to ask you to be yourself and set you up for failure. I also won’t ask you to change because that’s cruel when you can’t. All I’ll ask is that you recognize worth as something you make, and not as something that happens. Do this and everything bad becomes good.
You can’t change who you are. Now don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot about ourselves we can improve. You can learn how to live a healthier life, cope with, and ultimately manage your problems in a way that doesn’t make you want to commit suicide, but ultimately it’s what you can’t change that people judge you for.
For example, if you have a mental illness. Say, depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, you name it. There’s many kinds of typically trauma induced conditions. Sometimes you’re just born that way though. All of these don’t just go away. They’re here to stay no matter what you do. They’re a quirk, a unique trait you have that explains the way you think. Still don’t believe me? Here’s another example, if you have an IQ of 100 which is perfectly average, you can’t just train to have an IQ over 130 becoming a genius. It doesn’t work like that.
There’s many more examples of these limitations we all have making us who we are. The unchanging reality that must be endured. So you shouldn’t be yourself because that’s an issue for people. You’re not good enough. Yet you also can’t really change because that’s not possible. You have limits. People will tell you to do one of these two things and they’re wrong. So what can you do? You have to make the most of what you are. You’ll find this is most of life. Discovering what you can’t change and therefore learning how to make the most of it.
Life is not something to accept as it is. Nor is it something to change. There’s a third option that people don’t seem to understand. It’s taking everything that currently is, and adding to it. No! Don’t modify it and make it something else. No! Don’t look at the facts and say that’s all there is. Add to it. I’m asking you to create something here. Don’t corrupt with a judgment on what it is and therefore what it must be. These are only part of the picture no matter how accurate that detail may be.
There’s a wonderful bigger picture you’re slowly creating over time even if where you currently are is considered problematic. I hate the term “mental illness”. There’s nothing wrong with you like the world would have you believe when they’re trying to sell you something. You simply don’t have enough added to you yet.
Why is it that we love kids and try to add everything positive we can to them but we forget that adults need this too? We don’t look at a child struggling and say, “look at everything wrong with you”. We try to teach them. Yet we look at adults who were never taught and that’s exactly what we say to them. We say, ”you have so much wrong with you”. It’s heartbreaking.
You’re not sick in the head. You’re a beautiful human being and I wouldn’t have you become anything else. You just need some additions. The right ones. Everyone has the ability to create these. You don’t need to be an artist for that. You simply need to make value in what is. Not what isn’t. Life is meaningless, and this is why you can’t be happy with things as they are, but you also can’t make it become meaningful either. All you can do is see it as more after you give it meaning.
I’m not going to ask you to be yourself and set you up for failure. I also won’t ask you to change because that’s cruel when you can’t. All I’ll ask is that you recognize worth as something you make, and not as something that happens. Do this and everything bad becomes good.
