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How do you deal with someone close to you who is knowingly sinning?

If there is a group of people you associate with, say in your circle of closest friends or family even, and there is one or two of them who continue to do what you consider a sin, how do you act around them? Do you avoid them? Change your circle?

Say they commit adultery or theft or slander or something else. But bottom line is that what they do is a sin in your book. What is the right thing to do? If they already know it's wrong, but they live as if they aren't sinning (Because let's face it, many things that are deemed wrong in the past are suddenly accepted by society as okay. Keywords being accepted by society, not right.) , what is the right thing to do?

Funny thing about right and wrong. Society changes it continuously for convenience. Do you see it? I'm asking this to you, especially to those who know what WWJD stands for. What do you think would Jesus do?

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Doomflower · 36-40, M

While you may act to minimize actual and potential harm to any nonconsenting parties I would advise involving yourself as little as necessary.

1) If you have the concept of sin you also have a concept of free choice and it's not your place to judge people anyway so mind your own business and work on your own sins.

2) You don't want to become a target of harassment for speaking up.

Casheyane · 31-35, F

@Doomflower I think I agree with 1, to some extent. But not when it affects a family or friends and send them to ruin.

As for 2, isn't there that quote? About the triumph of evil needing only the righteous's silence to happen?

If I want the easy way out, then I may just go with those and not ponder on this. But I ponder anyway. Because I think there is an answer to be found somewhere.

Doomflower · 36-40, M

@Casheyane i didn't phrase it correctly.

You don't need to piss people off by butting into their business.

BlueVeins · 22-25

In the cases you enumerated, I think the best way is just to confront them about it directly, or make some derogatory comment which suggests that what they're doing is immoral. Shame is a powerful tool, and when it registers to someone that what they're doing is wrong, that has a chance of improving their behavior.

Because let's face it, many things that are deemed wrong in the past are suddenly accepted by society as okay. Keywords being accepted by society, not right.

What are you talking about? Adultery is still wildly taboo; there are constant new song releases dedicated to hating cheaters. You can find videos online of people selling their cheating exes' shit, and few of the comments will favor the cheaters. If you steal something, then uniformed agents of the state will drag you into their car and put you in a metal cage, and the vast majority of people agree with that treatment, at least on some level. Slander is relatively accepted now, but moreso because the idea of truth is kinda disintegrating with the rise of fascism and all. So I guess that one might count in some circumstances, but most people still despise being lied to, and it's still a civil offense that most people agree should indeed be an offense.

bowman81 · M

We are all sinners. (Psalm 51:5)
Would you live as a hermit then? Jesus ministered to, fed the multitude, and healed the ailing. I don't remember him ever asking them if they were sinners or not.

I seem to remember it was Jesus who said "he who is without sin cast the first stone".

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Casheyane · 31-35, F

@BlueVeins Giving a list would be opening a whole debate, I think. Dealing with LGBTQ for instance. People have different views about it. And then there is this...

"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery." --Luke 16:18

See what I mean?
The way the world works is forcing things upon people. Even corporate starts to change their tone. I don't think there is any such thing as inclusion to all because one way or another, welcoming something means stepping on someone's toe or belief in this case.

BlueVeins · 22-25

@Casheyane

Dealing with LGBTQ for instance. People have different views about it.

Yeah, I think if someone's being homophobic or transphobic, then it's definitely good to address it with them directly. A lotta people were talking about the "harm to others" standard, and transphobia definitely fit into that category. Some might hide behind a "difference of opinion" defense, but ultimately all morality is opinion on some level. I mean, some people hold the opinion that it's OK to murder people, but if they act on that, we still put them in a cage nonetheless.

"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery." --Luke 16:18

Ehhhh the behavior described fits a very bronze age definition of adultery, but not a rule utilitarian definition. If you lived in Jesus' time, you could make a reasonable case that divorcing someone and then marrying someone else is bad because there were no STD tests at the time. But nowadays, the harm caused by adultery boils down to a breach of social contract between romantic partners; divorce terminates that social contract anyway. Besides, stigmatizing divorce kinda pressures victims of domestic abuse into staying with their abusers, which is socially not very good.

Casheyane · 31-35, F

@BlueVeins I did say it would open a debate. So now you see that can of worms.

WhateverWorks · 36-40

I think it’s better to be the kind of Christian who lives by being loving example and follows Jesus’s lead by not judging others. When you live your values then your life becomes the evidence. Being judgmental and making them feel lousy will not bring them to Jesus or better their life in any way heh. This does go for family as well. You might have good intentions, but criticizing other regular people is not what Jesus would’ve wanted and it only alienates them.

If you find yourself ‘worried about being negatively influenced’ then it’s probably better you distance yourself from that circle and work on your own resolves, so that way you feel more solid when around people with different views.

Graylight · 51-55, F

Tell me first why you believe in sin and not natural consequences, as the rest of the universe and animal kingdom here are bound by them? What is it for you that makes a consequence a religious thing, a wrong in the eyes of God?

Funny thing about right and wrong. Just as things once thought improper are now deemed acceptable, much to the horror of conservatives, some things once thought proper and godly were never to be judged in the first place, like wearing haughty clothes, growing one's hair too long or besmirching a neighbor. It works both ways.

What unconditionally loving god would punish his followers or those who've never even heard His name? Why would the heavens or Universe care about the "morality" or seeing a drag show for fun? In the farthest reaches of space, do you think it matters if Elisha loves Allison?

Why wouldn't an omniscient, omnipotent God construct a playground of learning and creativity rather than a ladder of ever-ascending rungs of growing difficulty along a path of worship just for Him?

Graylight · 51-55, F

@Graylight

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CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

I actually don't understand the concept of sin so I don't even use the word or I'm not always sure what other people mean by it. If you mean something that is morally wrong to me, then depends on what kind of thing they do. If I learned they are a thief, a shoplifter, I wouldn't be able to trust them anymore so I would distance myself. If I learned they vandalize historical sites with graffiti, I would try to stop them doing that and tell them if they have to, then they could do it at places where it wouldn't be so damaging. If they cheated on their partner, I would tell them I think it's wrong but that it's their life so I won't poke my nose into their personal things but I'd also ask them to never use me as an excuse to be away from home or something like that.

MasterofNone · 26-30, M

I'd ask that question again to answer this question. WWJD with those people except forgiving and accepting, knowing that they will face consequences sooner or later?

Most people face the consequences only when all the suffering comes at them right before death but consequences always come.

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Casheyane · 31-35, F

@WhateverWorks PM?

WhateverWorks · 36-40

Yeah, sure. Just to give you a heads up though I’m always multitasking when I’m on the site so if there’s delays between my messages it’s nothing personal @Casheyane

Casheyane · 31-35, F

@WhateverWorks No worries. I don't always check message box too. No pressure.

4meAndyou · F

Be in the world, but not of it.

NerdyPotato · M

I'd mind my own business and not force any particular believe onto them. Just because it's something I wouldn't do, doesn't mean they shouldn't either. An exception to this is when they hurt others. Then I'd talk to them about it.

Thevy29 · 41-45, M

I don't judge people. Its not my place.

Besides Jesus was fond of drugs. Very fond of them in fact. And he was actually a pretty cool guy. I know everyone who claims to be Jesus is viewed as crazy and he only did so when he was off his meds. But he fed the hungry and looked after the sick and even did a bit of carpentry on the side... His birth name was Gustav. Or Gusta for short.
I know, some people may take offence to this. 'sticks and stones love', get over it. Perhaps he was crazy or perhaps he was the real deal. All I know he was a good guy.

Casheyane · 31-35, F

@Thevy29 I honestly find it fascinating how you phrased that whole thing up.

I'm having this guess than none of it is sarcasm. Or is it?
So I'll just ask. Source please? Curious where the drug and the Gustav came from. And yet the fascinating part is the last bit you said despite all those in the beginning. Huh.

Thevy29 · 41-45, M

@Casheyane Sorry, my writing tends to take on the style of whatever book I'm reading. 'Kidnapped' by Robert Lewis Stevenson. At the moment. Its an old book and quite hard to understand...

Gusta was a man in the town I grew up in. I guess schizophrenia ran in his family.

His Dad was a fisherman who had cleaned his fish from the side of his boat and didn't know there were kids swimming off the nearby Jetty. Shark came in and... The whole town blamed him and his family. He blamed himself worst of all. Snapped his mind with the grief. He was in the bank when some motorcyclists came in with their helmets on. I guess he got the wrong idea as to their intentions. Killed them both with his bare hands and ended up in prison.

Gusta was young boy when all that happened. It was a tough time for him. Got into drugs in a big way. His mind went not long after. Doctors medicine brought him back to his senses but he forgot sometimes to take it. Thought he was Jesus Christ reborn and went around town doing good deeds. The adults in town kept their kids away from him and his Dad who was back in town at the time my family moved in. They were just part of the fabric of life in town. My parents let us make our own minds up about them.

I was into religion at that time when I was younger. The good book said Jesus would come again. And here was a man claiming to be Jesus, who looked after all the elderly and sick in town. Who is to say he was or wasn't Jesus? That's the way my 9 year old brain worked.

Gusta passed away in 2010. And I still think of him fondly.

YMITheWayIM · 46-50, M

I would tell them how I feel about their behaviour, if it's a major sin/crime. Would try to ignore if it's minor.

BlueSkyKing · M

ABCDEF7 · M

I tried to make them understand and leave it. Either they changed, else I found myself losing contact with them (not intentionally).

SW-User

Most of us know right from wrong, we just don't all agree on WHAT is right and wrong.
If someone is doing something I am uncomfortable with or feel is a more major wrong.... I will avoid the person as much as possible. I just don't need the headaches.
What I understand about Jesus is that he dealt with all kinds of people because it was basically his job to do so and try to change people for the better.

SW-User

Haha i don't worry about those things

Jungleman · M

pray for them.

Lilnonames · F

I do like i do here i BLOCK them out my life

Casheyane · 31-35, F

@Lilnonames Even if it means blocking or distancing from the whole group?

Lilnonames · F

@Casheyane yes. Ive blocked my g/f on here and that was its downfall. But i didnt like her jealousy so i blocked her. Same as what people agree about me in nasty post i block them as well. My boss wanted me find him a hooker i blocked him of all contact but still did my job

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