An re-encounter with Losing my religion

The good old South way for sure. I'm losing my religion; I'm losing my grip on reality. It's my birthday soon and I'll be yet another year more than 50. I hate my life. Have gotten a degree in history but can't afford a master as yet. Love to study theology but that's basically been denied by the powers that be on earth. My love life is a real mess too. There's this ghost from the past that comes to haunt me almost daily. Every day at my workplace I need to defend why I've been there already for more than a quarter of a century, let along that I get the respect and understanding for my points of view each time that I like to voice them. Even at the weekly meetings of my local Bible group I need to defend the basic understandings of my own Church against the extremes inside Christianity. I don't need this all, so I'm losing my religion yet again. Watched a terrific recent war movie today called Narvic, but that wasn't really an uplifting story either. Once again it wasn't. Why is it always like this these days? Why am I like this? Why can't people see me? Why aren't there more of us walking the right path towards better lands ahead? Why can no-one understand anymore that I'm doing the job of librarian for my community's sake, and why can't my fellow christians see that a true christian puts the Gospel across by daily example only and not by Bible-bashing people? Society isn't right so do your thing within. Why is everyone talking about the Second Coming and don't understand even the basics of the First? I'm fed up with it all. There's no more strenght in me except from deep inside in me, from the past, from my grandparents, and I wonder right now if that will last the course. When this song was first brought out I was still young and brave though; I was in the army and it was a beautiful summer. Now there's old age and it's a dreadful winter with no hope for more warmth nor sunlight ahead. It's how I'm feeling now. Loosing my religion indeed

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Carazaa · F

Thank you for expressing how you feel honestly! So sorry that you are feeling down. I don't know exactly what you mean, can you explain a little more please, How are we not understanding the first coming? I am not upset I just am trying to see your point? [quote] Why is everyone talking about the Second Coming and don't understand even the basics of the First? [/quote]

hartfire

It may feel rotten right now, but all things pass.
As a librarian you have all the right skills and easy access to an almost unlimited range of historical data, evidence and research papers.
You also have the ability to find a church and a congregation which matches your ideals and goals re the lesson from First Coming.
Life does start to get a bit harder as we pass 50; from then on, aging slowly gathers momentum. But we can each do plenty to keep ourselves fit and healthy in body and mind - and there a huge compensations in deeper understandings of life, and richer and deeper relationships with others.
Things can get better, and you can achieve it.

canusernamebemyusername · M

I'm an atheist but I have to comend you on being one of the good Christians. You are open minded and tolerant and I appreciate that. You are not dogmatic but seem more spiritual than religious. So this is an encouraging word from me to keep doing what you are doing. Another good song is called my religion from Krystal Harris. It from like the 90s but I always liked the lyrics. Also the song Angel with a Shotgun by The Cab is a fav as well.

AndysAttic · 56-60, M

Probably one of the greatest songs ever.

robingoodfellow · M

It sounds like the weight of human society is crushing you. You're looking for wisdom in all things around you and it's just not there.
I know the feeling.

val70 · 51-55

@robingoodfellow Yes, that's the one. God is with me but the wisdom of the world is lacking

PhilDeep · 51-55, M

Is the above the lyrics of a song, or your thoughts, related to a song?

val70 · 51-55

@PhilDeep My present thoughts. I'm comparing now with times more than 30 years ago

PhilDeep · 51-55, M

@val70 I believe in looking closely, so that what isn't true becomes clear and what is does.

Human1000 · M

I’m so sorry to hear you’re struggling. Being an atheist in a blue state, I can’t imagine what’s you’re dealing with. Sometimes you need to forget..

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