Sunshine and Lollipops

I wanted to write today, as of yet the words escape me. I am going through so many emotions at the moment and the turbulence in my life is spiralling.
I know sometimes life throws a curve ball, but I feel like I have had a lifetime's worth in such a small space of time.
It is hard to keep going when all the things that keep you on solid ground crumble.
I hope I am strong enough.
I hope I am good enough.
I hope.
That tomorrow will be better.
That I can affect change for positivity.
That I can find myself again.

My word for the year is health. It has been ruminating in my mind for the past couple of weeks and it has helped to shape some decisions that I am realising I have needed to make.
You can be replaced tomorrow in many circumstances- in your home and in yourself, nobody can replace you.
I lost the girl I was. I lost her in the woods a long time ago and haven't found my way back to her.
I hope to find the woman I am, and to be able to embrace the person I am meant to be.
I am scared of this, and I don't know what the rest of my path holds. I have started the year with heartbreak, big emotions, no direction and little faith in myself.
I hope when I post at the end of the year that I am in a different place.
You can't have rainbows without rain, and I have had so much rain I am storing it for a drought.
But rain and sunshine make rainbows- we need the light and we need the shade.
I will embrace this year under the word of health.
Let's hope that the light is bright at the end of it. Or at least the rainbow colours are shining.