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NerdyPotato · M
On second thought: this question lacks nuance to answer accurately.
For starters: how do you define "men who claim to be trans"? That could be anything from people who were born and still feel like a man pretending to identify as a woman to get into a different dressing room, to actual transgender men who have completed a full transition, to even those who still have a female body.
It also speaks volumes that you only asked about one side of this. What about women who claim to be trans in men dressing rooms, with the same range of interpretations? The wording of your question does not give the impression you're interested in discussing the general implications of gender identity. Instead it comes across like you're searching for justification to oppose any level of male to female transitions. (And maybe the other way around too, though that's not as obvious.)
For starters: how do you define "men who claim to be trans"? That could be anything from people who were born and still feel like a man pretending to identify as a woman to get into a different dressing room, to actual transgender men who have completed a full transition, to even those who still have a female body.
It also speaks volumes that you only asked about one side of this. What about women who claim to be trans in men dressing rooms, with the same range of interpretations? The wording of your question does not give the impression you're interested in discussing the general implications of gender identity. Instead it comes across like you're searching for justification to oppose any level of male to female transitions. (And maybe the other way around too, though that's not as obvious.)
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SarahAndSamantha · 46-50, F
@HootyTheNightOwl If a transman, fully passing, beard, muscular build, short hair, etc. etc. walks into the ladies room (where he's 'supposed' to be, according to all of this, are the women going to be comfortable with that? In today's world, is he safe doing so? Or if he goes into the men's room, and somebody figures out he's a trans man, is he necessarily safe in there?
If I, a transwoman, admittedly non-passing goes into the woman's room, are the ladies going to be comfortable? Am I safe in doing so? How about if I go into the men's room? Am I safe in doing so?
So, we can't really go into the ladies room, can't really go into the men's room. Where are we supposed to go? a third, gender neutral one? They're not everywhere, and been plenty of times when it's been brought up that people get mad about that idea too. "why should we have a special room just to accommodate THEM?" Guess we just have to hold it until we get home.
If I, a transwoman, admittedly non-passing goes into the woman's room, are the ladies going to be comfortable? Am I safe in doing so? How about if I go into the men's room? Am I safe in doing so?
So, we can't really go into the ladies room, can't really go into the men's room. Where are we supposed to go? a third, gender neutral one? They're not everywhere, and been plenty of times when it's been brought up that people get mad about that idea too. "why should we have a special room just to accommodate THEM?" Guess we just have to hold it until we get home.
@SarahAndSamantha Exactly... I am genderfluid and I will go to the trouble of using the men's room when I present as a man (it's way too much effort to get loose, waist length hair tucked into a cap so that it sits right without too much bulging after you take it off to go to the toilet so women feel more comfortable with you being there) - though I choose not to bind, so it's pretty obvious that I am a "woman" because I'm not small in the chest department (aside from the chest, I feel that I am becoming increasingly passing by the day as I age - especially with the beard, moustache and chest hair... and, no, I am not taking anything to fiddle with my gender either way (no birth control or testosterone).
As I get older, I wonder if it might be worth transitioning at some point rather than taking the chance of HRT giving me the same issues that birth control did... maybe testosterone might be gentler on my body???
I have also wondered if men are comfortable with me going into the men's room, even where I've had no other choice because the man I cared for needed it and there was no functioning disabled facilities. I was there working, I certainly wasn't going out of my way to make anyone feel uncomfortable or lingering any longer than I needed to be there.
I have been known to hop into the disabled facilities more often than not - usually because it enabled me to continue to work at the same time as dealing with my own "business". Not only do I have to watch the person that I care for, but I also have to monitor that no mobility aids are stolen at the same time... so the extra space means that I can take everything to the bathroom with us. If I wait until the owner of the key I carry with me has been first, I see no problem with me going afterwards. I mean, not only am I already there, but I'm still assessing for safety - some of those floors can be dangerously slippery when my disabled person is already a fall risk and I might be needed to change dressings in the bathroom, which I have done numerous times before.
As I get older, I wonder if it might be worth transitioning at some point rather than taking the chance of HRT giving me the same issues that birth control did... maybe testosterone might be gentler on my body???
I have also wondered if men are comfortable with me going into the men's room, even where I've had no other choice because the man I cared for needed it and there was no functioning disabled facilities. I was there working, I certainly wasn't going out of my way to make anyone feel uncomfortable or lingering any longer than I needed to be there.
I have been known to hop into the disabled facilities more often than not - usually because it enabled me to continue to work at the same time as dealing with my own "business". Not only do I have to watch the person that I care for, but I also have to monitor that no mobility aids are stolen at the same time... so the extra space means that I can take everything to the bathroom with us. If I wait until the owner of the key I carry with me has been first, I see no problem with me going afterwards. I mean, not only am I already there, but I'm still assessing for safety - some of those floors can be dangerously slippery when my disabled person is already a fall risk and I might be needed to change dressings in the bathroom, which I have done numerous times before.
NerdyPotato · M
@SarahAndSamantha, @HootyTheNightOwl yep, when some State passed a law that people have to use the bathroom for the sex they were assigned at birth, there was a video from a fully passing transgender man complaining that he was now forced to use the women's bathroom against his will. The response? Hundreds of people saying they would beat him to death if they ever saw him in a women's bathroom. Those people fought years to put this into law and then threaten people who comply with it. But that's what you get for only thinking about one side of it.
@NerdyPotato It reminds me a lot of Brexit... and the red tape Brexiteers bought on themselves - then you get ten minutes of comedy gold like this from this Brexiteer...
[media=https://youtu.be/oC1UoQ_bJH8]
I'm fortunate in that I don't have to think too much about which bathrooms I use at the moment, given that I've mostly been forced to live as a outwardly appearing woman... but, given the fact that they haven't managed to get my hirsutism under control as a woman and I'm growing even more hair as I age, I'm wondering if I should try laser hair removal (I don't believe the results others say they've had) or just embrace my masculinity.
"I am what I am" is gradually getting old as the change is becoming increasingly noticeable and soon to be ex and my own family are passing hurtful comments and trying to force me to comply with the gender I was assigned at birth... I don't want to be hearing comments on my beard/moustache or lack thereof whenever they see me. I mean, who walks up to a biological man and says to him "You need a shave" or "Ooh, you shaved recently"???
So, if I shave my face, do I use the ladies toilets... do I use the gents if I don't shave??? Do I use the ladies because of what I have between my legs... do I get beaten up if I do??? Do I take the key for the disabled toilets with me when I leave here - because I won't get one in my own right??? These are all questions that I need to find answers to sooner rather than later because I need to know what my plan is...
[media=https://youtu.be/oC1UoQ_bJH8]
I'm fortunate in that I don't have to think too much about which bathrooms I use at the moment, given that I've mostly been forced to live as a outwardly appearing woman... but, given the fact that they haven't managed to get my hirsutism under control as a woman and I'm growing even more hair as I age, I'm wondering if I should try laser hair removal (I don't believe the results others say they've had) or just embrace my masculinity.
"I am what I am" is gradually getting old as the change is becoming increasingly noticeable and soon to be ex and my own family are passing hurtful comments and trying to force me to comply with the gender I was assigned at birth... I don't want to be hearing comments on my beard/moustache or lack thereof whenever they see me. I mean, who walks up to a biological man and says to him "You need a shave" or "Ooh, you shaved recently"???
So, if I shave my face, do I use the ladies toilets... do I use the gents if I don't shave??? Do I use the ladies because of what I have between my legs... do I get beaten up if I do??? Do I take the key for the disabled toilets with me when I leave here - because I won't get one in my own right??? These are all questions that I need to find answers to sooner rather than later because I need to know what my plan is...
NerdyPotato · M
@HootyTheNightOwl [quote] I mean, who walks up to a biological man and says to him "You need a shave"[/quote]
My dad and my brother. 😅 My dad even went as far as giving me 3 electric razors within a year because I wasn't using the one(s) I already had often enough for his taste.
My dad and my brother. 😅 My dad even went as far as giving me 3 electric razors within a year because I wasn't using the one(s) I already had often enough for his taste.
@NerdyPotato Hmm... Maybe they're part of my family, too???
I asked my mother a few years ago for some specific blades for my wet shaver (keep in mind that I need ID to buy them and they deny me ID) - so she got me an electric shaver... I don't use electric shavers on my face because I never mastered how to stop them from plucking my facial hair out by the root. Yes, it's only my face where they pluck - I shave everywhere else with no problems.
That said, though, I am thinking about using an electric shaver or hair removal cream on my legs going forward because of the reduced sensitivity in one of my legs... I like slicing that leg like donner meat.
I asked my mother a few years ago for some specific blades for my wet shaver (keep in mind that I need ID to buy them and they deny me ID) - so she got me an electric shaver... I don't use electric shavers on my face because I never mastered how to stop them from plucking my facial hair out by the root. Yes, it's only my face where they pluck - I shave everywhere else with no problems.
That said, though, I am thinking about using an electric shaver or hair removal cream on my legs going forward because of the reduced sensitivity in one of my legs... I like slicing that leg like donner meat.