I’m a very kind positive person.
However the second I feel threatened I turn into something I’m not and I can’t control myself and will say the most cut throat things even a demon inside a monsters body couldn’t conjure the levels of rage and hatred I feel.
I don’t understand where it comes from, I go 0 to 60 and it hits me as sudden as car accident and I act upon the violent impulses and urges to inflict harm on those I feel wronged me.
In person an argument or something as small as a disagreement won’t last long because it totally shakes my world and I’m the first to start swinging.
When I’m in these mind frames I cannot be reasoned nor rationalized with I just want to fight and will say ANYTHING to get the fight kicked off.
If somebody gives me a dirty look it’s something that sends me off the deep end and it’s not that big of a deal I know. But ti me it is and I can help it.
If I catch you staring at me I’m gonna wave to break the awkward tension I feel you’ve created for us both, if you look at me like I’m the weird one or give me a dirty look I’ll sound off!
I have been trying to get this under control as it’s not something I’m proud of, I don’t know if it’s anger or insecurity that gets me like that but I HATE IT!
Any advice on how to not be that person? I’m normally kind and chipper I don’t care for drama or arguments, I just don’t know where that bad person comes from.
I don’t understand where it comes from, I go 0 to 60 and it hits me as sudden as car accident and I act upon the violent impulses and urges to inflict harm on those I feel wronged me.
In person an argument or something as small as a disagreement won’t last long because it totally shakes my world and I’m the first to start swinging.
When I’m in these mind frames I cannot be reasoned nor rationalized with I just want to fight and will say ANYTHING to get the fight kicked off.
If somebody gives me a dirty look it’s something that sends me off the deep end and it’s not that big of a deal I know. But ti me it is and I can help it.
If I catch you staring at me I’m gonna wave to break the awkward tension I feel you’ve created for us both, if you look at me like I’m the weird one or give me a dirty look I’ll sound off!
I have been trying to get this under control as it’s not something I’m proud of, I don’t know if it’s anger or insecurity that gets me like that but I HATE IT!
Any advice on how to not be that person? I’m normally kind and chipper I don’t care for drama or arguments, I just don’t know where that bad person comes from.
26-30, M
