How to create a right balance between being passive and being aggressive?

I controlled my emotions and anger for years, it became a part of who I was. But I recently realized that if you don't stand up for yourself at times, if you remain overly passive, you're going to be mocked and bullied. That brought about a change in my attitude and I think I can show my anger now to someone who deserves that. I am trying to be more assertive these days. Now I am always ready to give back to the bullies a taste of their own medicine. While I feel more confident in myself now, I wonder if all that new found aggressiveness is good for me.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

SWisGoingWoke · M

I made it completely through high school without swinging my fist once, but everyone thought I was a real fighter...it's a lot about your attitude and how you carry yourself...body language.

beingawesome · 26-30, M

@Oosure: I wholeheartedly agree with that mate. Though I'm not sure I won't swing my fist if bullied now. And that's a huge change in me.

SWisGoingWoke · M

@beingawesome: One thing I've learned since high school...don't swing your fist unless you intend to do whatever is necessary to completely and totally decimate your opponent. Winning is the only option once you start a fight...do not just try to nullify the other person or "show them they need to back off." You do not know what they're capable of or willing to do, so you have to be capable and willing to go past 100% offensively as fast and furious as you can.

This message was deleted by its author.

beingawesome · 26-30, M

@Oosure: Wow that was really great advice. Thank you Oosure. I think I would refrain from getting in a physical fight. But I'll try to be more assertive and have my way with them.