How do i stop pushing people away/distancing myself from people.

Fear is self-reinforcing.
When we avoid the thing we fear, we never get the opportunity to learn that it's not as painful or dangerous as it seems.

I suggest using three tactics.
1. Improve your listening and speaking skills so that you are better able to create a relationship in which problems can be resolved when they arise. There are many ways to do this, but I think NVC is one of the cheapest and most effective. NVC stands for non-violent communication. It was developed by Marshall Rosenberg. He has written many books about how it applies in virtually every situation in life. He has plenty of free videos available on U-tube. And there are by-donations-according-to-means weekly practice groups available almost everywhere.

2. Challenge yourself in small ways. Notice when the desire to push someone away arises, and abstain from making that push for say five minutes. When you want to push, choose a different method. For instance, if you tend to use tactics that hurt other's feelings, don't; instead say, "I'm feeling the need to be by myself for a while," or the need to attend to such and such task, and make a polite exit.
If there is someone you like and trust, when you feel the desire to push, wait for an appropriate pause in the chat, and tell them your feeling, but use "I" language. Make it clear that it is how you are just now, even though it's changing, and that it's not something about them that has put you off.
This strategy will take time and persistent practice, but it will erode your fears, so that gradually you can take slightly bigger steps towards cultivating lasting friendships.

3. Deep within the Avoidant Personality, there are core fears caused by what happened as a child in one's family of origin, fears of abuse, abandonment or being smothered.
So it would also help to work on your deepest issues, learn what they are, how to recognise when you feel triggered by an over-reaction, and how to separate past influences from the realities of the present.
This takes time and patience. It helps if you have a support group to share with. And it helps greatly to keep a journal.
To prevent abuse, learn how to recognise the signs of abusive and controlling characters and definitely do avoid getting to know those people - keep them at a distance with a wall of politeness.
To overcome fear of losing someone, cultivate independence and pleasure in your own company and activities, and develop a circle of friends.
To overcome fear of engulfment, maintain a degree of independence (earning your income and having a room of your own and a means of transport) in all relationships, the freedom to spend time by yourself when you need it, and develop good boundaries, neither too flexible nor too rigid, but able to respond appropriately to the behaviours of others in accordance with your needs.

Keep doing it! 😛

I do it too.... I think it's involuntary... a reflex if you will.

This is going to be weird. But i named that negative, insecure part of myself “Maria” so everytime i get the urge to distance or when i get weird thoughts, i say “stfu Maria, no one cares”

“You’re not even real” i bully the bitch until i feel better. So, since you like “roast sessions” this should come in your favor

in what way do you push them away? be specific