I just.. don't want to exist

I don't necessarily have a good reason. I just feel like not existing. I'm a very empathetic person so I'm always there for my friends and family, even strangers. And I know my suicideness isn't anything good and that I should seek for help or talk to someone. I just..can't? I don't know how to open up to people, I don't trust anyone with such things. So I just keep going on and do what I have to do whilst still am there for others. But I'm so tired. I'm only 21. I just needed to write it down somewhere.

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whowasthatmaskedman · 70-79, M

Serious advice: Go adopt an old dog.. They will give you a reason to be. And you will give them a second chance.. And you wont believe the difference that will make.😷

Fiveohiguess · 22-25, F

@whowasthatmaskedman that actually doesn't sound too bad

whowasthatmaskedman · 70-79, M

@Fiveohiguess As I said, its serious advice. Just take a walk through a local animal shelter looking for an old dog and you will find you have a lot to offer..And thats really what we are talking about here, isnt it?😷

someoneuusedtoknow

Dear, I used to feel like you, always helping others, always being there for them and so on... It is extremely exhausting for us emphatic people to constantly care, constantly worry, constantly listen to others, it can overwhelm our well-being and put us in very depressing state of mind.
I used to wanting to end everything, tried professionals but as you just described it, "I just, can't...."
I kept on going and at some moment thoughts of wanting to disappear were just gone and now it is just existence, without feeling much you know...
What kept me in life is some "hope" that something in my life should happen that I deserve and from which I will be truly happy, for once in my life.
Still it did not happen but I am still waiting for it. It is what keeps me alive...
Keep fighting it and believe.
My prayers go to you.

Fiveohiguess · 22-25, F

@someoneuusedtoknow thank you! Stay safe!

TheDisciplinarian · 61-69, M

I have ( Thankfully stopped a couple suicides )
though..

Do a Mind thought experiment
Sort of relax and meditate
Think of what things you like and enjoy

Then think back....
To 1st moment "You" feel... things went wrong
What-how You feel you could of changed

Now
Simply change and modify your ways
To Best Align with your Best self

We have the Power and Strength to Heal..to change

Happy Hollidays to All !!

SW-User

..and sadness builds
to cloud my eyes
til hope it yields
and all but dies..

blindbob · 41-45

i get it. i just feel like a visitor. i don't feel like i belong here. i've always felt that way.

someoneuusedtoknow

@blindbob I feel the same way. "a visitor" ... perfect word to describe...

Fiveohiguess · 22-25, F

@blindbob stay safe!

SarithBorn · 18-21, M

Has these feelings been happening for long?

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SarithBorn · 18-21, M

@Fiveohiguess how long are we talking here?

Fiveohiguess · 22-25, F

@SarithBorn Few years. That happened a lot before, it calmed down for a while. Now they've been back for a few months.

SarithBorn · 18-21, M

@Fiveohiguess well we can talk about it if that is something u'd like to? just send me a message when u feel like it. 😇

HannibalMontanimal · 26-30, M

Find distractions. suicide is never the answer

Fiveohiguess · 22-25, F

@HannibalMontanimal that's what I've been doing. I'm no stranger to all this. I'm just tired, iss all.

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TheDisciplinarian · 61-69, M

@Ferise1 Having a Good Rested state
Is so so Important

I once went 5 and half days with No sleep
Thankfully
I went to the Hospital
( it still took and additional day and half to sleep )

8 days..without sleep...can cause loss of life
Even jus5 2 or 3 days with poor sleep can Greatly Effect us ( poorly )

Happy Holidays to EveryOne !!

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TheDisciplinarian · 61-69, M

@Ferise1 No...No Drugs..
Upon arriving at Emergency room
I had 96% heart failure

Was released 10 days later when i was back up to 25%
Now 10 months later i am back Fully in normal zone
But have to take 5 scrips daily

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