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Is it right to change yourself for a relationship?

Or should they accept you for your flaws and who you choose to be?
NewBeginnings7790 · 41-45, F
Both.

A partner should be accepting of flaws but at the same time that’s not an excuse for shitty behavior.

Life’s not perfect and we all have flaws, but we should want to make our partner happy more often than not.
Iwantyourhotwife · 22-25
@NewBeginnings7790 yes ma'am. Great take
Rai97 · 26-30, F
Depending on what the changes are. They shouldn't change your entire character but some level of compromise must be there from both sides in order for you too to meet halfway and be happy. You cant just say this is how I am if for example they want you to do something a bit different than how you are because then you're just being lazy and not putting in any effort for your partner. But if they wanna change every single thing about you and they're never happy with you or your core values then thats not healthy.
Iwantyourhotwife · 22-25
@Rai97 so don't be lazy and selfish and work to push each other forwards to good and be ready to compromise without any of both sides being controlling, right?
Rai97 · 26-30, F
Iwantyourhotwife · 22-25
@Rai97 that's good advice :)
Thank you
AuRevoir · 36-40, M
Compromise is key in some instances.. you should always be willing to improve yourself for someone you love though there’s a difference between having a bad habit.. and someone trying to change your core personality..

But we all live and learn I suppose..
As long as you are genuinely changing for the better and not pretending to change or changing for bs reasons on their part
Mirkwood · 36-40, M
Depends what, and how much i guess.
We all can make some compromisee and adapt.
But again how much. If you feel bad and not youreself then surely, no.

If its part of your own wish, its all good in my mind.
I think i met a lot who was turned off by me because i seemed to want to change for them. But many times this was part of my own wish, and just something i wanted more once i had someone other than myself. I know this often be done by me, and not depend on others.. but it gives a little kick to do more.
Chelsiegirl · 46-50, T
yes people change no matter what.. its how life is..
Dv8rs · 18-21, F
Change is inevitable, but doing it for a relationship? That depends on if the relationship is worth it, to change.
caccoon · 36-40
I think being with someone else can help us learn our flaws and limits. We should have a willingness to work on our flaws, as long as we agree they are there and exist.

I do think some compromising will always happen, you learn to make changes in yourself and put up with certain things; accepting that people can't change unless they want to... And if they won't change but it causes too much unhappiness, you just have to leave them
Iwantyourhotwife · 22-25
@caccoon this is wise tbh

 
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