Married childless couples

I believe couples can have a happy and fulfilling relationship without children. I also believe someone can have a happy and fulfilled life without a partner or a child. Doing anything because others think you should or they do not approve of your choices is not living your life. It is living theirs. I didn’t want children. My sister in laws were always admonishing me or criticizing me for not wanting children. I would not have had my daughter except for becoming pregnant while on birth control. As soon as I knew I was pregnant I knew I would keep the baby. Since I was a teen and became sexually active I knew this was a risk and I accepted that risk. I would not have chosen the man who fathered her if I had wanted a child. It happened. My daughter knows all of this. She is the best thing that ever happened to me. I became pregnant on my 42nd birthday in June and she was born in March the following year. I loved being pregnant even though my hips ached the last month and it was difficult to get comfortable. Her birth was hard since I had scar tissue on my cervix from a procedure done to detect if I had cancer. I was in labor from Sunday morning until 6:30am Tuesday when she was finally born face up naturally. I loved breastfeeding her and caring for her. I do miss it but she is now 20 and dealing with depression, anxiety and panic attacks. She is a brilliant young lady but her anxiety and panic attacks are debilitating and it has taken from 7th grade until now to get a doctor to listen and try to help and get a psychiatrist. Would I have still not wanted children knowing my experience with her? Yes. Because she and others like her are dealing with a world that is becoming more and more antisocial, selfish and abuse in the workplace is more common than she or I want to admit. I wouldn’t subject this world on an innocent child or on an adult who is loving and kind and seeks the same in return. My experience has shown me it is rare to find. If you want a child, do so for the right reasons. Don’t do it because family, religion or society says you should. Do it because you have a loving relationship with someone and you have no doubts they will be there to help. Raising a child isn’t easy. Doing so as a single parent is beyond difficult. Doing so without a good financial foundation is even harder. I can’t provide a college education for my daughter. Most businesses want to see a college degree on an application which is ridiculous. I could go on and on as you can imagine. Deeply consider what you really want and if you can provide a good start for a child if you decide that is what you want. And consider your impression of this world and the direction it is going. Make your own informed decision and if the others don’t like it that is their problem not yours.

Never wanted the responsibility of it. I enjoy my life without that chain around my neck and I don't have issues about not leaving a legacy or continuing the family line.

I have depression and anxiety but im functioning. Ive been able to keep a job and be self sufficient even though its hard sometimes. I felt the same way as you i think with my experience id say if you have support like parents that can help you or your husband's side thay will help in terms of coming over so you can take a nap or have a day to relax and take a break thats a life saver!

Now that i have my daughter i can say my life is much more fulfilling and loving. Im still depressed sometimes and anxious but ive learn to self regulate much better.

I chose to not have any, and i’m happy without kids.

Kids give a purpose to life. I saw it as my second opportunity to life to see life from childhood, since we don't get to study life as a child. You are in the last phase, as I see you are already nearing 30, and any later can make things difficult. So you need to decide now. Your depression may go away, as the child wood keep you caring and occupied. But for the kind of history you have, treat the child as your sibling and not as a child and that you have to be a parent. Most parents make the mistake of masterminding and manipulating their child, to the extent that the child would never be let to think on its own and live its life.

But whether couple can have a fulfilling life or not, is subject to each one's interpretation. But most childless couple I have seen, live a secluded life with nobody to care.

I think people who don't really feel able to make the commitment should plan not to have children.

Yes they definitely can but you both need to be on the same page and not have regrets.

Sure they can! Kids aren’t necessary to live a fulfilling life..

I've never married and had kids, but I have had some long-term relationships with women who had kids with their ex-husbands. I have known plenty of childless couples throughout my life who have had very fulfilling lives - in fact, I'd go so far as to say, happier lives than those who yielded to peer and parental pressure to sprog. It's a personal preference, but definitely one I would address early in a new relationship before it becomes a potential problem.

I don’t think couples have to have children to be happy

My son and his wife both knew they didnt want kids before they married. She is a single minded workaholic and he is an overachiever who hates outdoors, so it works for them both to have careers and an urban lifestyle. My wife of course moans about no grandkids from them. But it doesnt worry me..😷

I think it’s completely up to each couple and not for anyone else to judge or decide.

I say sure they can, it's how they use their time together.

Me I couldn't have been a childless couple. I would have married someone with children (I did by the way) and treat them as my very own.

I am too much like a child myself. I'm just a Grey haired boy thats all about playing and feeling young at heart.

The rewards of having kids pays off later. It's something that I didn't understand when I was younger. I had one and often wish I had had more.

Hard to say. I have kids and can’t imagine what it would haven’t been without them. Friends are childless and they seem fine and don’t express regrets. Each to their own I guess

Yes, they can certainly live happy. You are making the right choice, and I have made the same one for many of the same reasons.

You have legitimate concerns, have you talked with your husband about this?