I want to ask men something

The question is irrelevant for me at this stage of life (including the prostate cancer drugs I am on). Looking back, I had no strong desire to have kids. It so happens I inherited a four year old when I did get married, and that was enough for me. It was the meddling mother-in-law who kept insisting we needed another child, that I had to have "my own" -- I consider both mine, even though the first is not biological -- and then criticized me at every turn for playing favorites after my wife bowed to her wishes and we had a second, which we really couldn't afford at the time. So from my experience you have more to worry about from meddling grandparent wannabes than you do from your prospective hubby. But then we men are all individuals with different perspectives and priorities.