my bestie confessed his feelings to me a month or two ago

i told him im struggling to have an interest in anyone at the moment or to date at all, and also would struggle too much as there was a great deal of distance between us. he told me today he met someone and they kissed and spent the whole weekend together. he said he needs to get over me and might put a little bit of distance between us

im afraid our friendship of ten years will end. ive been such a shitty friend the last year as ive been struggling a lot with the death of my mom and just everything else awful thats happened the last two years. which tbh ive been a shitty friend for the last two years in general. struggling to text back, set up times to call, reaching out first. if he realizes what a pos i am with this step back i wouldnt blame him for not talking to me anymore. but i love him so much and i dont want to lose him in my life.