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Why do some people hate compliments?

I'm dating a man who absolutely cannot take a compliment
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
It isn't that they don't like compliments.. its just they are unused to them, perhaps they come from a family that were never encouraging and never praised him for the things he did and/or he may have low self-esteem so finds it difficult to believe it when people say nice things.. He doesn't hate it.. no one does really, it just makes him feel uncomfortable...

The way to cure this is to keep doing it til he gets used to it :)
BigAssLeech · 31-35, M
Insecurity possibly, not feeling like he deserves them, not thinking they're genuine, maybe was just never taught how to act after receiving a compliment. There's any number of reasons
they don't think they deserve them
or maybe they think the person is lying
MarkPaul · 26-30, M
Are you being sincere in your compliment-giving? Are you complimenting him on meaningful things or on insignificant things? Are you complimenting him to embarrass him in front of others or are you doing it in private?
basicgirl12 · 26-30, F
@MarkPaul in private and as genuine as genuine gets. About things that matter like his intellect or his humour
MarkPaul · 26-30, M
@basicgirl12 Okay. Maybe he's not used to getting compliments and he just needs practice in learning how to accept them graciously.
AnonymousJSS · 22-25, F
I love compliments
SW-User
It’s a funny thing for sure.

I personally find compliments astonishing lol! I just don’t see what others see at times but the best compliment I received was being told I’m kind and caring ... I like that
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
Sometimes people just can’t say “Thank you, you’re very kind”.
DestroyerOfIdeologies · 22-25, M
As someone said, it could be a number of things. I'd like to emphasize one possibility. Maybe he was hurt by someone in the past who use to give him compliments?
DestroyerOfIdeologies · 22-25, M
It can be suspicious I guess. It's like someone going around saying they are smart or intelligent. except this time the person isn't doing it themselves but someone else doing it to them.

I also heard of a study that you're not suppose to keep saying to a child, "your so smart"? It does something to them.
DestroyerOfIdeologies · 22-25, M
Yeah google it.
Here are some things I came up with

https://www.todaysparent.com/kids/preschool/why-you-shouldnt-tell-your-kid-theyre-smart/

https://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyle/2012/02/why-you-shouldnt-tell-your-kids-theyre-smart

https://www.forbes.com/sites/learnvest/2012/10/10/want-your-child-to-succeed-dont-do-these-four-things/#3dfbb9403e1f

Now that last article said you shouldn't pay them for good grades. I somewhat disagree. that might not be a bad idea if you can afford it.
sometimes it's not necessary
Some people become uncomfortable with what they perceive as flattery.

 
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