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has anyone else married the wrong person?

the person i really loved was just really difficult to live with. we argued constantly. we broke up and tried again times. every time just too much argueing. but the love was real. real and deep and magical. i miss him so so badly.

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MartinTheFirst · 26-30, M Best Comment

Then why did you stop trying? That's not love. Love persists.

R5000 · 41-45, M

@MartinTheFirst Oh the naivety of a perfect world....

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@MartinTheFirst There is only so much a person can take, only so much a person can do, and only so long a person can hold on and keep trying before they have to realize and admit that it just isn't working and that it most likely never will. That is reality. And remember...it takes two. One person holding on and trying cannot make the other do the same. It may take two to build make a relationship or marriage, but a lot of times it only takes one to break it.

Sapio · 51-55, M

You have to learn to get up from the table when love is no longer being served.

zeeva70 · F

@Sapio Real talk.

smileylovesgaming · 31-35, F

My husband is amazing. We just don't argue

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vacationgirl · 36-40, F

@smileylovesgaming the sex with my husband is terrible. the great sex was with the man I did not marry.

smileylovesgaming · 31-35, F

@vacationgirl oh I see. Why stay with the husband if the sex is bad. Also you two argue all the time.

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@smileylovesgaming It's that way with me and my wife. We get along marvelously, we don't fight ever and it's extremely rare that we argue.

FoolishLuna · 56-60, F

Yes I stayed because I had a child. We compromised our lives for 20 years. Could never see eye to eye on things and there was constant arguing. We love each other dearly ...we’re divorced now and very good friends and we have a beautiful son. But sometimes two people just aren’t meant to be. Hugs to you!

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

"But sometimes two people just aren’t meant to be."
I so much wish my child's father understood and accepted this.

MountainMonk89 · 51-55, M

Married my ex when we were so young, and bad at decision-making. had kids pretty quick. It took a while to realize all we had in common was the kids. Yeah, it's possible to be led in the moment and later realize that "Wisdom" would had suggested a different path.

JoeR80 · 46-50, M

it's an unfortunate truth. so many people realize they married the wrong person after it's too late. some couples deal with reality after the kids are grown and divorce, so many different cases.

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

The occasional abuse, which I couldn't see at first, which I dismissed and made excuses for for years got to be too much.

Because it wasn't physical or frequent, I convinced myself it was my fault. I had it coming. I'm difficult to live with. This is all I deserve. No one is going to put up with me besides him. I'm not good enough for someone else.
... well I think you get the lies I bought into for entirely too long.

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vacationgirl · 36-40, F

@ozgirl512 see how fast the word abuse is used? is it our climate now? every time a man and a woman argue it is abuse? I said nothing about abuse. I said we couldn't get along because we argued. we need to take a hard look at our new culture.

ozgirl512 · 26-30, F

@vacationgirl I admit I was thinking of an emotional dominance .. The reason being you said you believed it was your fault .. It may have been a long bow I drew and I apologise if that is so ...

Starcrossed · 41-45, F

@vacationgirl I was talking about myself, not saying you were abused.

I assure you I have not been quick to throw around that word. It took me literal years to understand and accept that what was happening to me was abuse, and have had several people dismiss my story and tell my I've embellished or lied or that it wasn't abuse. BECAUSE WE IGNORE ABUSE AS A CULTURE. Because we have not been quick ENOUGH for entirely too many women who hold their story inside because people won't believe them.

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SW-User

Some people are too difficult to be with - despite the love.

Luckily though I've never been in that situation.

SW-User

“Can’t live with em, can’t live without em”

💕 true love in a nutshell 😌

Keep going ☀️

Gforce1163 · 61-69, M

I’ve been there and now I’m out the other side. It’s hard but life goes on

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Gforce1163 · 61-69, M

At times, yes, but I also know it was a mistake and overall I’m much happier now

vacationgirl · 36-40, F

@Gforce1163 I knew it. you still miss her. she was the one. u are just like me.

Gforce1163 · 61-69, M

She was the one for a while. I miss the good times but not the bad times and there were too many of those unfortunately @vacationgirl

Markymark · 46-50

Yeah, I’ve stayed in touch with my high school sweetheart for 20 years. I’m still in love with her. She broke up with me after high school and regretted it. By then I was married.

IrishPat · M

But if there was love why was the arguing so intense? Is it one of those things that is looked back on fondly but the reality may be less appealing?

SW-User

Do you want love and arguing and lots and lots of unhappiness or do you want companionship, friendship , peace and serenity ??

R5000 · 41-45, M

the make up sex was good - but having beer bottles thrown at me for no reason wasnt

indyjoe · 56-60, M

I did when I got married the first time...I'm more than making up for it now though.

SW-User

I did love him and he rewarded my loyalty by cheating and lying...so that ended that

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vacationgirl · 36-40, F

@Rattlesnake it was real love.

ozgirl512 · 26-30, F

No, you're just overlooking the things that kept driving you apart ...

SomeLikeItHot ·

Sorry to hear that he isn’t present now.
There is always tomorrow.

SW-User

Sometimes, timing is not in your favour.

PTCdresser57 · 61-69, M

I had the same thing...I found the right person yrs ago.

Withintent · M

Yes, but thank God and Greyhound she's gone.

froggtongue · M

That's kind of heart breaking. 😟

Pieman5000 · 61-69, M

Yes! I'm there now

SW-User

Yep

Outdoorfreedom · 56-60, M

Yes

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