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I Have Been Cheated On, But Never Cheated On Anyone

May 3rd 2017.
The day elliott broke my heart.
I got with him on the 21st of October back in 2012. Things were great, I could see a wonderful future for us.
It was never meant to be... He had cheated on me for an entire week without me knowing. His plan was to take me on holiday (that i had paid my way for) and then abandon me the week after. Turns out he dragged the relationship on for a year because i was someone for company.

I did everything that he asked of me! I dressed how he wanted, i acted how he wanted, Heck i was his bloody lap dog. He drilled it into my head that i wouldn't survive without him.

6 months later, His relationship with the psycho is falling apart and i feel bad that i like this sorta news. Karma is doing her work but she needs to do more!!!

So now i work my days away in hope someone will accept me for what I've been through and help me find out who i really am

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PhoenixPhail · M

People love you for who you are, not what you can give them. And I know so well that agenda of giving people what they ask for because you want them to be happy. It's a bottomless pit. You can never fill it. You can know, Elliott will continue chasing shadows, never finding true love. You don't have to do the same by continuing to sell yourself in an attempt to satisfy other people's agendas. Find who you truly are and share that with other people. The ones who don't find in you what they're needing in order to be satisfied, will fall away. Don't worry about then. And those who are in a place of wanting to relate to YOU, NOT to what you have, will be attracted to you. You will find it the solution to evolving your circle of friends. I think you'll be a lot happier operating that way.

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@PhoenixPhail I understand the majority of what you've said. I am slowly making progress as Im working on my appearance mainly so i can look how i want to look - My communication skills have improved a lot but people seem to take things the incorrect way sometimes (i don't understand how they take it the incorrect way)
i have my sister and my little squad and my little work family that have been supporting me. I was really shocked about how supportive they were as I've never received such treatment.
umm as an example a good friend of mine said ''You look drop dead gorgeous'' i had no clue how to respond as i never had that sort of thing said to me by elliott.

PhoenixPhail · M

@ShadowGothicGirl I'm glad you're making progress, and it's good to like your appearance. Better communication skills are always good, and it's what you communicate that's most important.

Yes, people take things the way they do. There's nothing you can do about that. But there is something you can do about being authentic. Just be yourself. Everything in that depertment is fine. Be as drop dead gorgeous on the inside as you are on the outside.

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@PhoenixPhail Im working silly hours to finally be rid of all the icky clothes i had to wear and get new ones that i like ~
Luckily i have my sister teaching me how to communicate better but she has little patience for me as some of the things i say are really stupid 😂

I think work is bringing out the real me as im really good with customers (my manager says im quirky but i dont know what that means) but when im outside of work i dont say a word to anyone, i like vanish into thin air (if that makes sense)

I will do my best!

Insomniac100

I'm really sorry you had to go through this. I went through a similar situation except It involved several different people, though not as intense as your relationship. After I lost my best friend of 9 years along with my group of friends and I got dumped during the same time I could totally relate even now to trying to move on from being a "beaten dog" I guess. It's sorta hard to find out who I really am and figure out the world after being sheltered in that bubble for so long but I think it's for the best eventually

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@Insomniac100 im sorry to hear that youve been through similar, We can get through this!

Insomniac100

@ShadowGothicGirl I guess I'm at the stage where I've made peace with myself and am starting to forgive...I know you might still hate him but hating someone for so long is gonna eat away at you. I hope you find someone who values you and treats you better

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@Insomniac100 I've never experienced hate before this, i was (kinda still am) the forgive and forget type.
As soon as i'm able to find the right pieces i'm sure i'll be back together and better than ever !~
And hopefully make a man proud of me for all that ive been through ^_^

Mangoroo · 31-35, F

I'm sorry.that really sucks.
I'm just glad you're not with him anymore.
Keep doing you. ❤

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@Mangoroo Its been rough and ive hit the lowest of the low but im picking myself back up. Its sorta hard as i spent so long obeying like a dog, its not the norm for me to speak and attempt a convo
(its kinda easier for me to talk online than it is in person)

xRedx · M

I think we all deserve to be with someone that will love you back regardless of anything. Don't wish him anything bad, just forget about him and move foward. Hopefully all goes well ✌

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@xRedx I think i will let karma do her work, she will come through for me soon ~
i cant stand the sight of him as i work down the road from where he works and then i see him in town and im like ffs...

bhatjc · 46-50, M

Just take one day at a time girl.

View 3 more replies »

bhatjc · 46-50, M

@ShadowGothicGirl It was not you girl. It was him. And you are right. We can not change the past. Just keep moving forward

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@bhatjc I am just glad that ive gotten over the ''you cant live without me'' garbage he got into my head.
i will work hard and show him who is coming out on top!

bhatjc · 46-50, M

@ShadowGothicGirl 😊🥂 To that miss Shadow. And you will come out on top

JimmyS · M

Better to find out now than in 5 or more years from now

View 1 more replies »

JimmyS · M

@ShadowGothicGirl Well I hope you find yourself someone who is worthy of you

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@JimmyS im not sure what is deemed worthy regarding someone. right now it kinda feels like i dont deserve anyone

JimmyS · M

@ShadowGothicGirl Believe me,you're definitely worthy :)

olderguy2016 · 70-79, M

good that you are free from him

View 1 more replies »

olderguy2016 · 70-79, M

@ShadowGothicGirl you are not without any guide.you are at right track,go forward and find right guy.

ShadowGothicGirl · 26-30, F

@olderguy2016 One day lady luck will grant me someone that will care for me ^_^
But this road is difficult to go alone...

olderguy2016 · 70-79, M

@ShadowGothicGirl difficulties are in life and u have to go alone.

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