I have never once wanted to be in a romance or married.

Marriage to me, growing up and watching it, on the face of it and when I heard others talk about it has never been something I've wanted. I have wanted to live with someone, wanted to be in a relationship and have that company forever but never wanted to be married.

Before the age of 22 I never read, watched or studied romance with wanting.

For me, I want to be just in someones company and do fun things. To me, love is assigning an importance to another and appreciating what they are. In active form, as oppose to passive is praising and validating. The only way I could understand it was through this mechanical process and how my body reacts.

Romance, seduction, marriage and all of what is courting, I am effectively blind to this entire part of the human experience. There is no instinct or anything. The compliments I get on my looks, my intelligence or my depth move past me like cars in the night.