Top | Newest First | Oldest First
FriendlyKate · 18-21, F
Honestly, I would prefer my phone and the other person's phone be private, but I never had a serious relationship yet, I don't like people fiddling with mine even if Its someone I really love, it's like reading a person's diary, just gives me the heebie-jeebies just thinking about it tbh 😐
View 1 more replies »
FriendlyKate · 18-21, F
@Fifidog I would ask them what they wanted me to play lol
Fifidog · 26-30, F
@FriendlyKate lol oh okay. So in my case if I wanted to ask him about being open like he used to be how should I bring it up/say it? Should I mention how I feel closed off to him and if we ever got back together we’d need to be transparent with each other to feel connected again?
FriendlyKate · 18-21, F
@Fifidog I'm a Christian, so forgiveness is something I'm trying to master, with that being said my first initial thought is why would you get back with him, find a person that values you, for who you are, but in the meantime change yourself into the person who you would love to be lol
Queendragonfly · 31-35, F
Imo you lost the entitlement to his phone once you two broke up , if you're friends you gotta respect that boundary and let him have things in private. After all. You're only gonna be upset because I guarantee he's flirting with women as single, he even did as taken.
Getting back with him is like chasing that too small blouse you sent to good will only because you really liked it 5 years ago before you gained 15 pounds.
Aka: BAD idea.
Getting back with him is like chasing that too small blouse you sent to good will only because you really liked it 5 years ago before you gained 15 pounds.
Aka: BAD idea.
Fifidog · 26-30, F
@Queendragonfly yes I agree bad idea. But if we were to get back together hypothetically should I have a right to the phone or not?
Suggestmeone · M
I can say that I did the same thing and began hanging onto my phone, carrying it always. Got texts at night . All the hiding is obvious to others and eventually it blows up on you.
You were cheated on, it hurt bad enough to break from him. Why go back and go thru it again, especially when he does it still.
You were cheated on, it hurt bad enough to break from him. Why go back and go thru it again, especially when he does it still.
Fifidog · 26-30, F
@Suggestmeone But if we were to get back together hypothetically should I have a right to the phone or not?
LittleLonely · 46-50
If you two get back together and straight away you’re worried about having access to his phone, shouldn’t that be a second go round red flag?
My love, he will give you access to that phone, but you will never have access to the new second secret phone.
His track record isn’t great, yet you are returning to him with doubts, insecurity and fear that make you want to have access to his phone.
Given the fact that he cheated, and he’s been blessed with your trust and the beauty of a second time with you, he should be treating you like a queen on his hands and knees, offering complete transparency before you even start to remember how much she hurt you and caused this PTSD. I
Also, I hope you learned from this experience that if he cheated, don’t be surprised if you never see his second or third phone.
My love, he will give you access to that phone, but you will never have access to the new second secret phone.
His track record isn’t great, yet you are returning to him with doubts, insecurity and fear that make you want to have access to his phone.
Given the fact that he cheated, and he’s been blessed with your trust and the beauty of a second time with you, he should be treating you like a queen on his hands and knees, offering complete transparency before you even start to remember how much she hurt you and caused this PTSD. I
Also, I hope you learned from this experience that if he cheated, don’t be surprised if you never see his second or third phone.
Northwest · M
@Fifidog Why would you want to go back to someone who cheated on you?
Setting that aside, once trust is broken, you need a plan to rebuild it, and the two of you need to agree on what that means. If it means have total access to his phone, then it's part of the deal. It's no longer about invasion of privacy, it's about rebuilding the trust.
And as long as you still feel you need to reach for his phone, the two of you should not be together.
Setting that aside, once trust is broken, you need a plan to rebuild it, and the two of you need to agree on what that means. If it means have total access to his phone, then it's part of the deal. It's no longer about invasion of privacy, it's about rebuilding the trust.
And as long as you still feel you need to reach for his phone, the two of you should not be together.
Fifidog · 26-30, F
@Northwest yeah that’s true I don’t think he’s the one for me even though it crosses my mind sometimes I know it’s not in my best interest. He cheated on me online twice telling the girls he likes them and wants them to be his girlfriend and all that stuff. What if he doesn’t think he needs to provide phone transparency to rebuild the trust?
Northwest · M
@Fifidog It's not really about what he wants, it's about what you need to start trusting him. Transparency is key in these situations, and "privacy" is no longer an option.
I'm going to say something controversial here, but some people need multiple people in their lives, to feel fulfilled. This is an invitation to cheat, just a public service announcement, so you can figure out what you want, and what a potential partner may be able to offer.
I'm going to say something controversial here, but some people need multiple people in their lives, to feel fulfilled. This is an invitation to cheat, just a public service announcement, so you can figure out what you want, and what a potential partner may be able to offer.
ServantOfTheGoddess · 61-69, M
ServantOfTheGoddess · 61-69, M
@Fifidog I don't think you would have a right to it. Many people keep some stuff private from their lovers or spouses.
But also, like others are saying, why would you want to get back with him after he cheated on you, and he doesn't seem too interested in having you back? Can't you move on?
But also, like others are saying, why would you want to get back with him after he cheated on you, and he doesn't seem too interested in having you back? Can't you move on?
OogieBoogie · F
Fifidog · 26-30, F
@OogieBoogie that’s true I wouldn’t like that either But if we were to get back together hypothetically should I have a right to the phone or not?
deadteddy · 26-30, F
If you two are not together he doesn’t need to share anything with you.
And why are you friends with someone who cheated on you? You clearly have feelings for that person and they don’t have any for you, maybe pity. Stay out of it, It’s a perfect recipe for depression. Also watch some Shera Seven videos. Aside her silly gold digging talking, she has some very good advice for young women who have low self-esteem.
And why are you friends with someone who cheated on you? You clearly have feelings for that person and they don’t have any for you, maybe pity. Stay out of it, It’s a perfect recipe for depression. Also watch some Shera Seven videos. Aside her silly gold digging talking, she has some very good advice for young women who have low self-esteem.
looking4thesun · M
Cheaters cheat and lie. It's what they do
Jenny1234 · 51-55, F
Move on
basilfawlty89 · 31-35, M
