Meeting a girl I've been talking to long distance for two months in person tomorrow. What are some things to address?

We've known each other for a year, but actually ramped up flirting/talking like two/three months ago. I'm meeting her in person for the first time tomorrow.

I guess exclusivity is assumed, but should I still bring it up? I'm also not sure how soon is to sson to become official (actual "boyfriend/girlfriend"). I'm not toooooo experienced with dating but I don't think I'm clueless either.

Logistics of somewhat regular travel to see each other and if both of us are okay with that

Religion/faith, future career/life plans, thoughts on marriage, kids, etc. Is it too soon? Should I focus on enjoying our first "dates" (I'll be there for 5 days) and then have the more serious talks the next time we see? She's on the other side of the country so travel is expensive, I anticipate we'll probably meet in person like every 2-3 months.

We're both 23 turning 24 this year if that helps/matters.

REMsleep · 41-45, F Best Comment

Don't overwhelm each other with plans and serious talks during this first trip is my advice. I was in a ldr for 8 years due to college and then immigration issues.

Do pay attention to your physical chemistry. Pay close attention to the vibe check from her in person. See if you can get a sense for her life and meet one or two of her family or friends.
See how dirty or clean she is, how she treats strangers, how the person that she had painted a picture of for you online and over the phone checks out with who she is in real life.
Never assume anything regarding exculsivity. So many people have different ideas about things even when you think that exclusivity is implied never assume.

Don't rush into sex it will cloud your head regarding how you really feel about her.
Have lots of fun but remember that one day you would presumably but with the non vacation non exciting trip version of her. Thats the person that you want to know.

HootyTheNightOwl

I'd address exclusivity if that's something that is important to you in a relationship - just to make sure that you're both on the same page. Obviously, that can matter more to some people than it does to others... especially in a distance relationship.

I'd also want to be feeling out if this person is someone that I would want to be with in the longer term, too - so, if we were to get serious, who would be the one to move or would you both look to meet in the middle??? Some careers aren't the easiest to just pick up and relocate without taking a hit.

Given that I have an illness that means that I am deteriorating, I am straight about that and I ask if he can live with potentially pushing a wheelchair or helping me in and out of one - for some people, a wheelchair is a deal breaker. For me, it helps me to see where my relationship would stand, should I get much worse. Of course, the wheelchair ensures that I can stay out for longer and do more of the things that we planned to do without getting so tired that I am in bed for the next 4 or 5 days.

HootyTheNightOwl

@somedude15 If a guy asked for exclusivity without asking me out, I would think that he's pretty serious about me - but not yet ready to enter into a relationship with me... but, given how many posts I read about relationship insecurities these days, I'm probably the only triangle in a box of circles.

I would give him the time that he's asking for, though. Unless she's actually telling you that she's talking to other men/women, I'd try not to get too anxious about it, too. She's not giving you any reasons to not trust her - so why torture yourself inventing them???