Wrapped in pure black, silky sheets, blankets and pillows. Candlelight bouncing. Palo Santo.

About to snuggle these pillows until they love me like I love them. Not before my book smacks me on the face once or twice. It's my kink.

I do wish for a warm body beside me at times. But I'm afraid I'd get addicted to it. If they loved me I would spoil them rotten.

Rotten.

I can't risk bringing chaos to my precious nights. Bare skin. Moisturized and scented with Egyptian musk. Mixing with the Palo Santo on the air. So quiet, only bugs and frogs. This is so simple. So relaxing.

Someone else would mess this up.

Someone else's hands on my body, though. Someone slow and patient. Sharing deeply. I open my little world, my legs. If they trust me. If they don't cage me, they would join me and know why I giggle so much even when life sucks.

I don't know what any of this means. I'm just, I guess dying for a taste of something new and delicious. Thing is, I want it forever, until it's old and delicious. Most people just let it get old.

I don't want to fall asleep with those kinds of thoughts and feelings. I want to fall asleep, my mind full, my passion fulfilled.

A good book and a diddle and these 100% dark cacao pillows can do so.

Almost.

🖤