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I had my performance evaluation today

My boss told me, "Please don't ever leave."

So, I've got that going for me, which is nice.
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My group leader liked me so much he gave me bag of weed each week. I asked, "Do you want money for this"? He said, "No, I just want you to keep doing what you're doing because you're my best worker".

However, when it came time to get hired full time the company's doctor had me terminated for having high blood pressure. I was so upset I contemplated suicide, but a nurse said, "I can't see why you're so upset because you've been given the golden ticket. Some people would kill to be in your shoes. You can get on disability thanks to them and never need to work another day in your life".

She was right. It took me 6 months to apply, but when I finally did Social Security back dated my claim to the day I was fired.
DunningKruger · 61-69, M
@Disney It took forever to get my wife on Social Security, this after she had already suffered a brain tumor and endometrial cancer. Fortunately, we got her on before we found the cerebral aneurysm, which led to a small stroke. But, yeah, it was nice to not have to worry about that once it was done.
@DunningKruger I've seen people not deserve it get it while people who are actually sick die before they get it.
Such an unfair system