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I Have Random Thougths

I see how happy my friend is with her boyfriend and the things they do together and it makes me realize how unhealthy my relationship actually is. They talk so nice about eachother and do cute things constantly together and I’m always made out to be this terrible person by her. I’m always wrong and the way I feel doesn’t really matter because if I actually spoke up and said how I felt she would leave and thats not what i want. I love her but it’s always the same thing and she doesn’t realize what she does because she’s so stuck on how she feels or whatever I have done and we can never move past any of the mistakes I’ve made months ago because she’s so stuck on them. How are we ever gonna fix this if she can’t ever learn to forgive me or anything? I’m trying so hard and it’s just not ever good enough. We will be fine for a few days and then something will trigger and we will fight and then say mean things and ignore each other for hours or longer and I’m so tired of it. I just want us to be how we use to be and I’m honestly starting to think we could never go back to that place we were at. She use to do the cutest things for me like send cute paragraphs and constantly tell me how much I mean to her and stuff and she would post cute things about me and we don’t even follow eachother on anything anymore because we just end up fighting and then blocking eachother and I know you don’t need to follow your significant other on everything but It’s just the little things that matter the most you know? I don’t know what to do anymore I’m tired of fighting and constantly feeling like I’m such a terrible person or like I’m so wrong about so many things when anyone in their right mind would feel the same way. I just needed to vent.
Tatsumi · 31-35, M
You try telling her that?
donutworryboutit · 26-30, F
@Tatsumi I wanna make it work it’s just so frustrating cause we fight over the same things over and over again and she says she forgives me but if she did we wouldnt continue to fight over it. And then she makes it seem like I’m so horrible and says I’m one sided when she doesn’t even look at what she does. It’s always Stuck on how she feels because she doesn’t try to see how i feel feel and then she says i do that when like??? I’m always wrong or something and it’s so frustrating and upsets me.
donutworryboutit · 26-30, F
@Tatsumi there’s so many problems and I’m trying to work on it but it can’t just be me you know? I’m stuck trying to fix this and then I’m constantly to blame or made to seem like I’m so terrible and it’s unhealthy cause I’m gonna end up resenting her
Tatsumi · 31-35, M
@donutworryboutit Heh. Yeah. That sounds like a relationship, alright.

I know. Two way street, right. Sounds like a tough situation you've got there. :/ Good luck, chica.
Giaalexer · 26-30, F
Hey you just over thinking .listen to me I lived your situation just stop trying to get her back at least by that way.pretend in front of her that you moved on even your not and act in healthy way like adults you guys used to be in relationship and you broke up that's it I want you to show her that you are healthy not over sensitive and try to chat with other people and hang out with other girls iam sure there are many girls and guys around just to have fun

 
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