I am the jerk here?

My mom and her side is all native American. She has this feather fan on display in the living room. A bunch of us were over for dinner yesterday and I made a comment about how it looked kinky with these leather tassle things hanging from the handle. I picked it up and pretended to smack my one sister's butt with it while laughing. My mom got offended as did my oldest sister. I have 2 older sisters. I got lectured essentially. I still don't think making a joke is wrong.

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Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F

While I understand you were trying to be hunorous many Native Americans connect feathers to our creator. A lot of spiritual rituals are centered around earth elements including feathers because some tribes consider them a gift from the creator beyond the sky. Feather fans are used as part of cleansing rituals like smudging or even may represent the life of a person that has passed on. I would never call someone a jerk without knowing the whole story but I would suggest you approach your mom when things aren't as heated and ask her to tell you more about the importance of the fan. I would say the fan is a remembrance from a person that has passed and she will probably go in depth on the types and colors of the feathers and what they represent. I hope they forgive you and everyone can move on.

Astro · 56-60, M

@Fungirlmmm That's exactly what happened. She went into a big lecture about what it means and what it's used for. She uses it for smudging and cleansing mainly. She was upset because I should have known better.

Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F

@Astro Now you know and maybe she won't be so uptight.

Astro · 56-60, M

@Fungirlmmm Hard to say, this is the same woman who wouldn't let my sisters and I watch peter pan as children because of how the native Americans were portrayed.

22Michelle · 61-69, T

@Astro So you should have known how important her heritage is to her.