No, but I have firm boundaries because of past experiences. Being around as many people as I am and working in the field I do, making sure I'm ok is part of the process. I think it's a big part for everyone. If you can give without it taking huge chunks from you, do so. That's what we're here for. If you continue to give and lose yourself? It's not worth it.
basilfawlty89 · 36-40, M
@HijabaDabbaDoo I seriously need to internalize this.
ScreamingFox · 41-45, F
@HijabaDabbaDoo oddly enough I just had the same conversation and I had no idea I've been giving what I don't have and that's why everything is shit.
Thank you. Your words reinforce something very important I've been neglecting
Thank you. Your words reinforce something very important I've been neglecting
Livingwell · 61-69, M
@HijabaDabbaDoo You sound like you are in healthcare or hospice. Boundaries/limits are very important for mental health.
PerfectionOfTheHeart · 46-50, F
That’s not how I operate. I care about others more when I’m okay because I know I’m in a better place for them.
It’s when I’m not okay that it’s hard to divert the attention away from my own healing so I can provide it to others. I still care. But I feel more powerless to help due to the ripple effects incurred from battling too much in a short amount of time while pretending to be okay and still having to be 101 versions of myself for others. …I’m tired, boss. I don’t want to be when I get pulled back to that survival state, but I really am and unfortunately it shows.
It’s when I’m not okay that it’s hard to divert the attention away from my own healing so I can provide it to others. I still care. But I feel more powerless to help due to the ripple effects incurred from battling too much in a short amount of time while pretending to be okay and still having to be 101 versions of myself for others. …I’m tired, boss. I don’t want to be when I get pulled back to that survival state, but I really am and unfortunately it shows.
ScreamingFox · 41-45, F
@PerfectionOfTheHeart I feel this way too. I have no doubts about your integrity and capacity to care, you're a beautiful person. Sometimes we all need more 🖤
JimboSaturn · 56-60, M
I do care. In fact we have given away all our money to people who needed in desperately 2-3 times. I know what hardship is so the gives me the grace to be empathetic.
Strongtea · 22-25, M
I do care, but I rarely get involved or help other people. I suppose I do have an attitude that does measure myself against others and I prefer it when I’m doing better than everyone else.
Yesterday a lady offered to help me and it was quite clear she had less money than me. Today I do feel a bit rubbish about how I view other people and how I have treat them all these years.
Yesterday a lady offered to help me and it was quite clear she had less money than me. Today I do feel a bit rubbish about how I view other people and how I have treat them all these years.
ScreamingFox · 41-45, F
@Strongtea those are things you can change if you want. There are a lot of genuinely kind people out there that don't deserve to be criticized
Strongtea · 22-25, M
I do want to, I really will try. I realise I’ve been treating people pretty badly. 🥺@ScreamingFox
Livingwell · 61-69, M
No. I care about others regardless of my worry state. I know people that are plain ambivalent to others pain but I am not one.
SageWanderer · 70-79, M
My problem has always been that I care too much, especially in cases I can’t do anything to help.
I do what I can. Maybe I should do more but I still help out at food banks.
RosaMarie · 46-50, F
I think that the better I'm doing, the more I'm able to be there for others.
CountScrofula · 41-45, M
My entire life is working to help others so nope, not how I roll.
exexec · 70-79, C
I care, and I feel bad when I can do nothing to help the ones who are hurting or are in need.
HowtoDestroyAngels · 46-50, M
No, that's not my style. I've got too much empathy in myself to be like that.
ScreamingFox · 41-45, F
@HowtoDestroyAngels same, to my own detriment sometimes, I'm sure you understand
HowtoDestroyAngels · 46-50, M
@ScreamingFox without a doubt.
wackidywack · 26-30
Nope
Lilymoon · F
I care. But I've learned it's not always best to put all your eggs in one basket.
I always care. Probably too much
caccoon · 36-40
I have more space to care about/for others when I am doing okay 💙
I care too much
Jenny1234 · 56-60, F
Of course not.
Kiesel · 56-60, M
Not necessarily
Unquestioned · 70-79, M
I care about the family and friends that I love. Other than that, I don't really like humans, not even the family and friends that I love.
Someone has to do something in order for me to not care about them.
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