Joe Biden Arrested For Harboring 11 Million Illegal Aliens
Former President Joe Biden was placed under arrest today for harboring just over eleven million illegal immigrants.
Following the arrest of a judge in Wisconsin for attempting to help an illegal immigrant evade capture, Biden was arrested and charged with the same crime but "times eleven million."
"We're pretty sure it's a record," said FBI Director Kash Patel, after announcing the arrest. "Incredibly, this man apparently committed all eleven million crimes in the span of just four years. That's over five crimes per minute for four years straight, assuming he never slept. And, we have reason to believe this man slept about 16 hour per day. It's a crime spree like no other."
According to sources, Biden will plead innocent, claiming that he has no recollection of bringing in eleven million illegal aliens or doing anything else of note over the past four years. "Ask anyone - I've been at the beach for the past four years, minding my own business," said Biden. "I've got hundreds of witnesses saying I've been right here under this umbrella, sipping margaritas and baking in the sun since 2012. It wasn't me, Jack."
At publishing time, the FBI had entered day three of reading all eleven million criminal charges in court against Biden.
Following the arrest of a judge in Wisconsin for attempting to help an illegal immigrant evade capture, Biden was arrested and charged with the same crime but "times eleven million."
"We're pretty sure it's a record," said FBI Director Kash Patel, after announcing the arrest. "Incredibly, this man apparently committed all eleven million crimes in the span of just four years. That's over five crimes per minute for four years straight, assuming he never slept. And, we have reason to believe this man slept about 16 hour per day. It's a crime spree like no other."
According to sources, Biden will plead innocent, claiming that he has no recollection of bringing in eleven million illegal aliens or doing anything else of note over the past four years. "Ask anyone - I've been at the beach for the past four years, minding my own business," said Biden. "I've got hundreds of witnesses saying I've been right here under this umbrella, sipping margaritas and baking in the sun since 2012. It wasn't me, Jack."
At publishing time, the FBI had entered day three of reading all eleven million criminal charges in court against Biden.
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