I must be a sociopath

I swear at the funeral I felt nothing, NOTHING. Devoid of emotion all the time. I mean. I'm more likely to feel something if one of my sisters is crying but usually? Nothing. I remember at rehab they wanted to ask what I was feeling before the group thing. I was always like, apathy? Apparently they didn't like that. And I had to invent an emotion to appease them. Heck that's why I drank, so I could feel something. It could stem from me stamping down emotions in high school when I learned my family were homophobes. But.eh. at least I don't use crafted emotions to control others. I'd rather be myself. A pissed off gay dude who feels nothing. Just a rant