I know this is going to sound harsh but you gotta stop feeling sorry for yourself and take the initiative to change something about your life. I used to be stuck in this frame of mind for a long time and it’s a vicious circle and it was so painful constantly feeling like shit about myself. I made some lifestyle changes such as getting a different job and going back to school and it made a huge impact for the better on my mental health. I’m very sorry you feel this way but you have the right to be here just like everyone else and you matter to people even when it doesn’t feel like it. Xoxo