I Battle Depression

I have the worst story to tell u. I am 20 and I have been messing around with a guy for a while and he is 23 and has two little Boys and a gf. a few days before my 20th bday I found out I was pregnant. my dad found out on my 20th bday which was the 11th. I got yelled at for days and I got talked into having an abortion. I am completely against abortion. to me it is murder. I have been crying the past few days and my dad woke me up this morning and said I can take the car to work this week but next week I am going to have to find another way to work because I won't have the car anymore. when my dad found out on my birthday he said that if I was going to chose to have the baby I can't stay in his house. so I ran away and slept in a motel over night and had dad pick me up in the morning. I am extremely suicidal right now, the pain I feel in my heart is without a doubt the worst pain I have ever been in, in my life. all I want to do is die. please no judgment because honestly I can't take anymore. I just wanted to tell u this because my dad doesn't understand my feelings for him and I don't know what else to do.

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zacksb1

Why ruin two lives? you obviously cant even take care of yourself. It is your choice but its not a logical one. The extra struggle for yourself, the selfish burden your going to place on your family, sounds like an unstable and reliable dad. Your setting yourself up for hell. You could get out of it by having an abortion. Then re focus on getting yourself back together cause your mentally out of it. I hate that we havent experienced anything about the real world, from living on our own in our own place, getting a car, etc. I dont understand how you/people can be suicidal if you have not experienced the freedom we get in a couple of years. But forget all of that when you have a kid... im close with a girl at work who had a kid just too early. Shes not happy at all. Seen her pawn the kid to her parents cause she wants to go out and have fun with her friends. You dont live for yourself anymore. And if you battle depression, those days where you really need a good day for yourself wont exist anymore. Better get out of that fairy world quick cause your not only setting yourself up for a much harder life, but your childs too. Really want your kid to end up with the same mental problems you have? do yourself a favor and actually listen to an adult who can forsee future events and expenses you just cant yet because your on fantasy island

zacksb1

also if someone on here tells you that you can do it all, its prob because they are from some hick state in the south or the midwest where the cost of living is cheap. Where rent for a decent place could be $600 bucks, which is nothing if you 18-19 living with a couple of people. But your in NJ. We dont get places at 18-19 like kids in other states because cost is so high here. So if you choose to have this thing your going to be better off moving to a place in pa where the cost of living is so cheap. You want to be selfish and have this baby, be prepared for all the little things you have no idea about that will hit you ever so hard

BradScott

Choosing not to have an abortion is not selfish. Having one destroys the life of the one developing and can cause years of grief and guilt for the poster.