I Am Depressed

Out-Of-Focus... She was desperate. It was at the point where any little thing would make her anxious. Any little thing would make her cringe. The monster found its way into her shell and took all her emotions with it. All that's left is that numb feeling. There is no more crayons, no more silk, no more warmth, no more seashells. Just a dark abyss that keeps pulling her in. She has a hole in her stomach and every part of her is falling out all at once like water shooting out of a faucet. The worst part is, is that there is no one there to stop the faucet from running, and there is no one there to turn the faucet off, not even herself. The blue sky that she once used to imagine herself forever flying in is no more. The word "calm" is not in her vocabulary. In her room laying on her bed, she just lays there staring at nothing. Trying to feel the least bit calm that she can think of, because her anxiety level is so high, she would explode if anything touched her. She can't stop wringing her hands and moving her feet and bobbing her leg up and down, and her whole world is moving faster than she can ever explain. She's about to lose whatever bit of control she has left inside of her. Running through the house trying to do anything but stand still, her vision gets blurry, and faces around her don't look normal. They look morphed and dephormed. Her heart is racing and she can hear it pounding in her ears and she can feel a slight vibration in her body each time that thump comes. She feels like she's about to faint and fall to the floor like a dead weight. She doesn't know why this panicky feeling came, but she can't push the feeling away this time. It's too strong. Stronger than any feeling she has ever felt. Everything looks out of focus and like the whole world can go back at any minute. She's trying to hold on, but she is losing strength each second that goes by. Soon there will be nothing left.