I Fight Depression and Loneliness Everyday
I don't remember or maybe I don't know who I am "without" depression... It seems that being depressed has become a part of me, of my past, my present and future. It seems that depression turned out to be an addiction, sometimes when I feel good, I wonder why I'm not feeling depressed again.
This fight is getting harder, during my EP years, I knew I could deal better with my mood oscillations, however, it's been one year that I have been drowning myself in this sea of loneliness and depression. I feel difficulties in knowing what is dream and what is real, I can't sleep properly and I feel extremely hopeless.
I don't see good things for my future, things are falling apart and I feel like I'm losing the will to fight against it.
I feel so unlovable that I don't think that there's a solution for this. I just don't know what to do anymore. If it was in the past, I would be here complaining that I have no one to talk with, but even if I do have people to talk, they don't seem to care, nor give any importance to my feelings.
I just don't know what to do to feel better. And I do want to feel better, or maybe I just don't.
This fight is getting harder, during my EP years, I knew I could deal better with my mood oscillations, however, it's been one year that I have been drowning myself in this sea of loneliness and depression. I feel difficulties in knowing what is dream and what is real, I can't sleep properly and I feel extremely hopeless.
I don't see good things for my future, things are falling apart and I feel like I'm losing the will to fight against it.
I feel so unlovable that I don't think that there's a solution for this. I just don't know what to do anymore. If it was in the past, I would be here complaining that I have no one to talk with, but even if I do have people to talk, they don't seem to care, nor give any importance to my feelings.
I just don't know what to do to feel better. And I do want to feel better, or maybe I just don't.
31-35, F
