I Am Bipolar

I'm wondering is there are different "degrees of intensity" of being bipolar.
(I'm sorry if it's a weird question...)
Recently I've started fearing that I might be bipolar, because I keep having ups and downs. I get easily super hopefull and enthusiastic about things making all sort of dreams until one say I have like an emotional crash over a little thing and just feel like crying and feeling dumb that I'm just daydreaming and having too high expectations when all I was feeling and all that optimism was just in my head and not real.
I know it's wrong to auto diagnose ourselves, I know bipolar is a serious thing and I hope I don't upset anyone with this message...
I'm just trying to understand myself and I can't afford a therapist...
I've been trying to read about bipolar disorder, ended up reading about BPD too and now I'm just very confused.