I don't know what to do...I cant keep living like this.

My brain, my mental illness will not let me live in peace.

I cannot keep living like this...but I also don't want to hurt my family.

I'm trying religion...I'm praying to Jesus but idk

I'm starting to think my family would be better off without me. Heck even this world would be better off if I was gone.

My family would hurt for a while but they would get over it eventually. They would go on to live happier lives than the one they current live with me as a burden.

If only I weren't so scared.

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Dainbramadge · 56-60, M

Ok. First, you know it's depression talk about hurting yourself and it's never the right answer, right?
Are you on any medication or even seeing someone for this?

I'm bipolar 1, the fun one that sleeps all the time and never wants to socialize, and I was riht there where your at not that long ago myself.
I have a particularity difficult case as mine seems to be mostly medication resistant.
So I swing both manic and depressed quit often.
I have going through this for about 15 years now.
New medications or dosage changes every few months.
So I get to feel those type of feelings kind of regular.

So, if I may ask, seeing anyone about it?
Taking anything?

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Dainbramadge · 56-60, M

@cyberdude28 Well as difficult as it can be to stay proactive about no settling for"It's as good a it will be", don't be afraid to try something else.
There is really no need to suffer constantly and your doctor works for you.
Is it anxiety?
That's exactly how I felt when my anxiety was out of control and just beating me hard day in and day out.
I found Abilify helped with that aspect a lot.
Not Xanax or any of the others like it.
Those were just 4 hour reprieves for me.
If you need to talk shoot me a PM.

cyberdude28 · 31-35, M

@Dainbramadge Thanks for your concern and advise I appreciate it. I'm holding out as much as I can.

Dainbramadge · 56-60, M

@cyberdude28 Ok. man. Hang in there and don't be afraid to tell your superscribe that you are not where you think you should be.
Also, that anxiety, if that's whats got you right now, is crazy hard to deal with.
Just remember that th depression will make hurting yourself seem logical but in your heart you know that isn't right.
Wish I could do more.

OlderSometimesWiser · F

Some very good advice here.

https://similarworlds.com/society/4903873-No-therapist-is-perfect-they-are-not-gonna-solve-all-your

YoMomma ·

Maybe check into a mental ward and get help. My brother used to go to one all the time 😏

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