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am i bad? im confused...

Poll - Total Votes: 7
for an 11 year old,yes. ur bad and seek help
for an 11 year old,no, but try to get therapy
no you are not.
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You can only vote on one answer.
(TW: a lot of vent, sh, suicidal thoughts, etc)

1/28/2019: the start of it all, my birthday, I had just turned 7 on that day. I had a birthday party at a rollerskate place, I had learned about suicide and thought "What kind of dumb person would do that?!" that year was.. sad, so much happened in that whole year . including my mom being an alchoholic and when she came home she drank until she passed out on her bed. 2019 was when she really was bad, she would scream at me, and when i tried to talk back she would throw things at me or the floor. usally i would never get hit. (2020) i was in online school due to covid-19 and i would start slowly becoming depressed. my room was messy and i never had any motivation to clean it. my dad and mom i could never talk to them. i would purposely not eat because it was a punishment, it was all my fault. i would continue onto 2022. when it really got bad. i was exetremly depresed and i would scratch at my thighs and my wrists. (part two maybe..)
Aranea1991 · 26-30, M
I got really sad reading this and i just had to write something here. You are definately not a bad person (no one is) and its also not your fault. Is there someone at your school you could talk to about your situation like a liaison teacher or similar? I would really like to offer a listening ear you could talk to if you want or need it. But given i am a grown man and you are a girl this would probably seem a bit eerie or strange so i leave that up to you of course. As my fellow previous poster already mentionend, you have to be very careful around here. Nevertheless i wish you all the best for the future and much love.
Aranea1991 · 26-30, M
@IHEARTFRIEDCHICKEN Do you have grandparents or other family relatives or just you and your parents? Another idea would probably be to join some sporting activity. Without going into too much detail, do you live in a rather rural area or a crowded place?
@Aranea1991I might get signed up for singing or art class.
Aranea1991 · 26-30, M
@IHEARTFRIEDCHICKEN Thats pretty cool :) I hope it will be fun.
MyNameIsHurl · 41-45, F
You should definitely reach out for help. Of you dont feel comfortable to tell your parents you can tell an adult at school
MyNameIsHurl · 41-45, F
@IHEARTFRIEDCHICKEN well I would tell your parents how you are feeling
@MyNameIsHurl I can try but its hard because they always ask "is your life that hard?" it triggers me
MyNameIsHurl · 41-45, F
@IHEARTFRIEDCHICKEN well it's hard for parents to understand because we grew up very differently. The struggles are different nowadays
No. You should not feel like a bad person. Was it painful? Our scars remind us of our past. I don’t know if this is helpfull or not, but it helps me 2 think about it like that.
Thank you all for ur support, TW i am a minor (11) but i am very mature for my age.
MyNameIsHurl · 41-45, F
@IHEARTFRIEDCHICKEN this site has a lot of old creepos, I wouldn't talk to anyone in private
@MyNameIsHurl yeahh
i know, i got weird msgs on discord once so ik that ;n;
Not even a little. Your mom and dad are probably struggling. It's not your fault.
@Spoiledbrat my mom does work 48 hours a week, she used to have a scratcher/lottery ticket addiction but she quit.

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