I Miss Someone Who Died

Today, I've heard my mom cried about something and I asked what happened. She said this: "Your aunt's dead, she died." With those words, I couldn't believe it. I just.... couldn't believe it. She died of the coronavirus. It attacked her organs and was shutting down one by one. I haven't saw her in a long time and the only way I saw her was through my mom's phone. My aunt and I weren't that close, but we're close enough to be family!

I was praying.... and praying.... and praying.... and praying. It reminds me of my sister who passed away years ago as it was the first AND last time I saw her....

I was so furious, I had to punch something. Even this won't bring her back. It was too late. I'm not sure if I can take it anymore. I lost my sister, I've almost lost my older brother, and now... now my aunt's gone... For good...

She died in the hospital at 5:37 p.m., room being quarantined and all... and her last words, who told my mom, was, "I'm tired..."

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Mamapolo2016 · F

My brother died in early April, not from the virus, but we weren't allowed to see him.

It hurts and it's scary. I am sad you are going through this so young.

🤗🤗🤗

The only comfort I can offer is that I have been in the room when people died, and they were not scared. When you are older, death isn't the scariest thing that can happen. Don't think about your aunt as alone and terrified. She was tired and ready to sleep.

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Mamapolo2016 · F

@xSiFiGamer2016x Everybody has a deep down. That's only part of who you are.

xSiFiGamer2016x · 26-30, M

@Mamapolo2016 I'm just afraid to show it, but if I do, I'll lose the people distantly and I'm already going through enough...

Mamapolo2016 · F

@xSiFiGamer2016x Take care of you - and your mom - for now.

ThePerfectUsername · 70-79, M

I feel for you buddy. I lost the only adult I've ever had when I was a little older than you. At the time I thought it'd crush me. I cried in the street, I cried at work. I was a mess. It does get better after a while but it's never easy. 🤗

xSiFiGamer2016x · 26-30, M

@ThePerfectUsername Thanks 🙏

Ian123 · 61-69, M

I know how it feels when a family member dies, you want to give up and not carry on. Give yourself time and let yourself grieve. Take one day at a time and things will get better. You don’t forget but to learn to live with it.

4meAndyou · F

Oh, my dear friend...I am so, so sorry for what has happened. I will pray that your beautiful Aunt be held in the palm of God's hand, so that He may cradle her and bring her with Him to heaven. In death, there is no more pain, and a peace so encompassing and all abiding you and I can barely imagine it.

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4meAndyou · F

@xSiFiGamer2016x You MUST grieve. You must NOT give up. If I could hold your hand I would...but do nothing right this moment. It is too new and too raw. After my father's death, every time I thought of him for the next two years I would begin crying, and it was not something I wanted to do...it was very inconvenient to feel so deeply and so horribly while I was trying to drive...to work...with red eyes.

I could not even look at his pictures. I had to hide them because I just could not see his face in a photo. But then...suddenly...I could look again. After two years.

And then once I was able to look, I began to remember all the wonderful and funny things he did and said...and when your grief has ended, that is what you will do, too. For your Aunt...to keep her alive and beautiful in your mind.