The way some people have it

We really didn't have anything to do with my dad parent's at all. When they died I really felt nothing for them. My dad dad he died year's ago from old timers what I heard. And my dad mom died a couple Year's ago. Now my mom mom she died over 20 year's ago. I was close to her and my mom dad he died last year from Covid and old timers. Luckily I got to see him a few months before he died and I got to tell him goodbye. Luckily both my parent's are doing well

It's difficult, because obviously it's great that they don't understand, but also they don't understand. You'll never be that happy or safe, but you don't want pity. You just want to be treated like a person, but there's a sadness they don't recognize and it frightens them. So I stay alone.

I couldn't be at Vickies funeral but her daughter shared enough to make me feel I was.

To the question I simply lie and say I'm fine all things considered.

The truth is "Of course I'm not OK. What the hell is wrong with you. I lost the best relationship I ever had and there's a gigantic hole in my soul"

It's not worth answering truthfully because if they asking that soon they haven't a effing clue. To say they mean well doesn't help.
The pain may subside but remains forever.

Hugs