You ever feel so angry you become psychotic?

Welcome to my life. Im so angry and furious and enraged and it doesn’t stop. Once I become angry it just doesn’t stop, I just stay that way and it doesn’t get better. No matter what I do it doesn’t stop and I become enraged and just stay that way. I’ve been like this for an hour now and am so exhausted. I can’t take any more of this and it’s too much. I want to sleep forever and never wake up. I just want to feel calm for once in my life but it won’t happen. I took double my normal dose of medication just hoping it would help me but it’s doubtful. Why am I like this? Why can’t I just feel calm for once in my life?