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How does a person live alone and not get lonely? (both)

I have lived alone for more than 30 years and in all that time I have never been lonely.
Some people do not need others around them to enjoy life.
While others have this compulsion to talk for talkings sake. To engage non stop in chit chat.
I have a huge variety of interests. Be it Jigsaws puzzles, crosswords, reading both fiction(horror) and non fiction books.
My number one method to keeping boredom at bay is to go camping across this wide state of mine. Western Australia is 2.646 million sq km's.(England is 130,000)
Camping, fishing, beach combing, bush walking, easy mountain climbing, canoeing, crabbing,.
I think there are certain truths I have embraced to enjoy a contented life. I do not feel I am missing out on anything.
I know marriage is no guarantee to stave off loneliness. I have a strong self image of myself so I do not need constant reassurance from others. I do engage with those around me. I know my local corner store owners by name. We share life's little moments when I visit their store.
If and when negative thoughts crop up in my mind, and it does happen from time to time, I actively take steps to be rid of them. I say out loud, "Get out of my head, you are not wanted"
I write the negativity out of my mind. Very effective way to remove it. Pick up a pen and write. Do not think about what to write. Just let it flow until there is no more.
My life is one of contentment that I have made to work. It does not happen without putting in some effort. I smile inwardly when I hear people say, " I'm bored"
I think, "Well your not putting in an effort to change the situation.
It also gives me mirth when people say, "I never meet anyone, no one invites me out" All this while sitting on the couch playing video games for 18 hours a day.
Life does not come knocking on your door. You want a life of contentment? Get out there and make it happen.
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Travelbug · 56-60, F Best Comment
I have lived alone for close on 20 years and wouldn't have it any other way. I have a pretty full on job where I meet lots of people but don't socialise with them as much as I used to as I prefer travel and my hobbies now. I've had relationships too, but I like my own space and would never move in with anyone.
Travelbug · 56-60, F
@Gusman totally. I do what I want as I have no ties. Some of my friends and colleagues do get envious of my carefree life and always want to hear about what I've been up to. I've always got things planned ahead to look forward to.
Gusman · 61-69, M
@Travelbug We've got it haven't we?☺
Travelbug · 56-60, F
@Gusman yeah, we're doing what makes us happy.

Trevo · 26-30, M
This is how I personally see things.

Human beings need to engage with others in order to be "happy". This is not just an opinion, we're a social species. Being social has helped us to survive. It's in our genes.


In my opinion you've been using a number of distractions to block the feelings of loneliness you experience. It doesn't mean you don't feel lonely, it just means you don't give yourself the chance to experience these feelings.

The most important thing in life is to be happy. If you've made it this far without needing anyone around, regardless of the way you did it, then that's great.
Trevo · 26-30, M
@Unlearn don't forget I'm a human too. I have my own experiences and I'm sure many have similar ones. I can not impose my experiences as having more value than yours. That's when studies and stats reveal themselves to be important. They give us a general picture of reality.
Unlearn · 41-45, M
@Trevo well...happy studying and living to you :-)
Trevo · 26-30, M
@Unlearn since I began having more insight on the subject my life has only improved. So thank you 😊
Newkidintown · 51-55, M
Well written post. I have read the comments others have made and found them interesting as well. You have said you are content. Good to hear. But I do wonder if there is anything that you feel you have missed out on, any longings or regrets.
Newkidintown · 51-55, M
@Gusman Ha! I was debating whether to reference BR or LR ;)
Gusman · 61-69, M
@Newkidintown Always express what is on your mind. Then you are never left wondering, should I have?☺
Newkidintown · 51-55, M
@Gusman I try to. Often you have just a fleeting opportunity to, and must seize the moment.
proteus · 56-60, M
My Australian friend, I see that only a few got your message. People fear loneliness, because they cannot stand face to face with themselves.
I don't see a contradiction in your attempt to communicate your truth to the world. From my perspective, you have achieved the number one rule: Self esteem, self dependence. Most people confuse "relate" with "depend". Only when you become "a whole person" you can interact without interdepending.

I may share a different perspective for life, more close to @Trevo , but respect yours deeply
Gusman · 61-69, M
@proteus Thank you. It is, Each to their own.
I am content, I do not need anything more in my life.
I feel more like me when I’m alone than I do when I’m with my husband sometimes.( Especially when we’re around other people).
User41 · 36-40, M
An yet here you are. Talking to strangers, no?

I agree with most of what your saying though.
User41 · 36-40, M
I’m not judging. I’m asking.

An he answered me when he said “What my messages do is it encourages those people who are depressed, alone, lonely.”
Good clarity for the curiosity in you.
User41 · 36-40, M
😂
SW-User
Insightful, but how do you read horror books when you live alone? Doesn’t it scare you?!
Gusman · 61-69, M
@SW-User It is a fictitious genre, made up, not real. Why be afraid of something that someone has imagined?
SW-User
I'm alone but not lonely, not sure boredom is being lonely, boredom is a different emotion. I'm happy enough with my dog for companionship, other than food, water and shelter I'm good to go. ☺
Unlearn · 41-45, M
I totally relate to your post...but there are times when you want to share your joys and sorrows with.
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SW-User
Your like a one man renegade ..

 
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