I just can't

Recap: I'm a transman in a very homophobic and transphobic family.

Recently, I bought a ticket to a party organised by our school. It's in 3 weeks, and I was thinking of putting on some relaxed jeans, a white T and an opened shirt. It's not elegant, but not too relaxed either. I never liked being too elegant since it just doesn't match my vibe. But my mother insists I wear a dress or a skirt, or she suggested a 2 piece suit, but with a tight shirt ( meaning my boobs will show). I refused, and she keeps blaming it all on me again, saying I am ruining the family and other personal stuff I cannot discuss here. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't even feel free outside of my home, because now I'm pressured into wearing what my mother wants. If I just don't wear what she wants, she will start arguing with me again and I'm tired of it. I just can't seem to find something that will make me feel comfortable, and that will satisfy my mom.

Top | Newest First | Oldest First

IsaacDeSnuts · 22-25, M

Even though shes your mother, she shouldnt let you decide what you should be wearing. I mean theres nothing wrong in dressing the way you want to unless ofc its indecent. She should definitily have a say in whom you're dating or seeing, since youre young though.

Anonimusu · 22-25

As a transman who is also in a very transphobic and homophobic family, all I can say is this: screw your mom. Screw anybody who thinks about what's best for you regarding being yourself. You're not ruining ANYTHING by being happy. I'm sorry that it's challenging to be yourself when it comes to presenting as masculine, especially with a mother. trust me, I've been through your situation before and I get it. If your mom never comes to accept the fact that you don't want to be feminine, then f*ck her dude, her ignorance shouldn't be worth your time. Besides, the fact that she wants you to wear a tight shirt is frickin weird, like, what gives her the right to insist on making you dress in something that makes you uncomfortable, physically or mentally? She has no reason to justify your happiness. I'm not too sure on how to help further in terms of legitimate advice, but I hope this helps life you up just a little bit.

CrappyParentsInc · 18-21, F

Thats messed up, our dsd is openely homopobic and mh mom dont care she sta slove who you wa r, she uga clithes for us that will piss him kff and tell him tk deal with it. Its your body your choice man, if it comes dkwn to it pack another set of clothes in yoru bag and brubgbit with you, chnage when you get there and before you come back, i donr think it shoidl get to dking that hopefully it donr and your parents learn to respect you

Teirdalin · 31-35

You mean trans boy, really nobody would call someone under eighteen a man. Anyways just be rebellious and ignore what your parents want.

LordShadowfire · 46-50

Judging by the fact that I can't view your profile, I have to assume you're under 18. That's unfortunate, because until you're of age, she does get to have the final say in what you wear. I'm not advocating that this is a good thing, and I wish your mother could understand the damage she is doing. But sadly, unless you go to the trouble of keeping a change of clothes somewhere else, there isn't much you can do.

Add a comment...