Developed a crush on another woman.

I have been straight all my life and I’m even married with a child. I have recently noticed that I developed a bit of a crush with another woman. She is lesbian and married to a woman. Of course I will not take any action on this crush but it’s the first time I have ever had a crush on a woman before. I noticed I get a bit of butterflies when she is about to come in the room. Has anyone else developed feelings for the same gender for the first time as an adult? Why is this?

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VeronicaJane

It seems that many married women, even with children, develop these feelings - even well into the 40's, or later. Sometimes it ends up with a divorce and the women pursuing a lesbian lifestyle. Other times they may share this with their husbands/BFs and continue their relationship as bi. Maybe opening the relationship, but remaining together.

zonavar68 · 56-60, M

@VeronicaJane Women in relationships seem to almost always have a 'backup plan' which is a man (or woman) on the sidelines they will indulge in if their current romantic relationship becomes unfulfilling to them.

VeronicaJane

@zonavar68 "almost always"?

zonavar68 · 56-60, M

@VeronicaJane Ok so in 100 percent of my relationships (2), both exes have hooked up with people on the side. My first ex cheated with her 'backup' before we broke up (because of her cheating), my second ex hooked up with a former high school friend not long after I left her (yes I left her, not the other way around). I've never been married btw - both were defacto relationships.

Also some of the women I dated more than a few times (since leaving my second ex) to the point where exclusivity was presumed went straight for their next option after they (usually) ended things because I couldn't meet their 'bare minimum standards' due to my work and family coming first.

Anecdotally it has to be assumed a women that a man wants to date has a 'list' of options to choose from. ;-) After all dating is now gamified and turned into a business transaction.