Feeling Confused straight to gay now feeling Bi ?? Hi everyone, feeling a little confused. I...

You're bisexual.

Bisexuality isn't a yes or no question where you're 50% men and 50% women. It's instead a complicated soup of emotions where you have different feelings about men and women which don't quite match on all levels. Like the fact you seem to be more sexually satisfied by men but still very much enjoy your time with women is...pretty normal. It's all over the place for people. Nothing is cut and dry and simple.

LookingForIt987 · 51-55, M

Welcome to SW, @Confusedgal43.

I know people say you don’t need a label...

My experience is that the label can be useful for yourself, especially when you're on the journey of discovery. Being bi doesn't necessarily mean it's a 50/50 split between interest in women and interest in men. If you don't mind the questions:

Do you actually want to have sex with a guy?
Do you possibly wany a relationship with a guy?

I'm not going to be able to say what it means if the answer to either is yes. But it hopefully gives you some mental, emotional, and/or sexual spaces in your head to explore.

Confusedgal43 · 46-50, F

Just to clarify as I didn’t mention I did leave my husband at 27 years of age when I realised I needed to be with a woman x

Convivial · 26-30, F

You can indulge both sides you know... You do what feels right for you

DragonFruit · 70-79, M

I have a journey of self-discovery which has taken many years to sort out.
As a young man, I dated and had sex with a few women and considered myself straight.
When I was 24 and "between girlfriends", a male friend got naked and kissed me....I felt surprisingly aroused and kissed him back. I ended up getting naked and having sex with him. For the next few years, my relationships were exclusively homosexual, and I considered myself gay.
A few years later, I met and fell in love with a woman and married her....I began to think of myself as bisexual.
After some years, the marriage became sexless and I was drinking heavily. When I was drunk, I became horny for men ...and I dreamt of having sex with men.
Eventually I concluded that, while I appreciated the beauty of women and could love women, I really was sexually attracted to men and not to women. I now identify as gay.
So....I've gone from straight to gay to bisexual to gay. Sexuality can be fluid, and can change as our lives do. You don't need a label, but sometimes labels help us to understand ourselves.

Cantsayno · 56-60, M

I think you may have not found the person that completes you.
During a sexless marriage and after my wife passed away. I have fantasized about being with a man again.
But now I’m with a fantastic woman and that urge is a lot less.
I think you’ll figure it out. Give yourself some time.

VeronicaJane

Feeling confused, but with those multiple relationships.... isn't that cheating if hubby doesn't know? He may have wanted to 'play' a bit too. or are you divorced?

SW-User

Don't label it ...just enjoy what you enjoy ..you don't need to complicate it

SW-User

What is it with people saying you shouldn’t label one’s self? If you can’t or don’t want to label yourself you’re bisexual. Also true straight or gay people are never confused. If you’re straight you may still find another woman attractive it’s just you wouldn’t want to be sexual with her. Falling in love with another woman is unlikely and next to impossible if truly straight. Although I have heard of it happening but it would be an exception.

Teslin · M

Don't label yourself, just be you.

SW-User

Apparently studies have shown that porn can skew people's interpretation of their sexual orientation. Might be worth cutting that out and seeing what feels right then.

Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

You should be able
To find a man who will allow you to have a girlfriend. Men aren’t threatened by lesbian relationships. That might finally satisfy you.

ViciDraco · 41-45, M

These things exist on scales and are not always just switches. It sounds like you may be homoromantic but lean heterosexual. Meaning you fall in love with women but have a lust for men. It can be very frustrating with the way society ties love and lust and making you choose just one. But if you need something to call it, I would say that is it. Homoromantic with a heterosexual lean.

It might be difficult to find partners who understand, but communication is going to important in this. Especially if your female lover gets concerned you don't respond as strongly to sex as she might hope.

Lostlostlost · 56-60, M

It sounds to me that you’re pansexual

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