I am so angry, frustrated, and so discouraged inside because of what happened to our lives before 2010. We used to have a life where we smiled a lot, always had something to look forward to, life was just more laidback. My mother got a medical diagnosis from a doctor when she was admitted for something else. The doctor said that she had cancer, he wanted her to begin taking medication after she was discharged from the hospital. The medication was Mextrate and Predisone. The problem was at the time is she was never tested for cancer; the primary doctor she used to have had indicated in many words that that they did not know what was really wrong, a test was done but it was inconclusive. The doctor had an attitude that day when my mother seen her. During the visit, the doctor told my mother that she probably would not see her 80th birthday or Christmas; she was 79 years old then.
I honestly wished that the primary doctor, and other doctors my mother my mother had seen at the time, had told my mother that she was bleeding inside of her body, she had to get rid of the birds we had; she wanted to move to another state; could not eat vegetables and the list goes on. I wished they did not tell my mother the bullshit they said to her because it took away so much from her. Her self esteem, feeling like a person, became depressed to the point that she do not want to bother anyone including us because she is tired of being snapped with doctors or by anyone. She do not want to enjoy the holidays. Our lives is a mess because of the negative garbage stuff mother had been told. The neat thing about this is that her blood doctor had told her in 2014 that there is no cancer in her body, her nutrophils are doing much better.
Some doctors like to predict to patients that they are not going to live. I rather they do not tell me about things like that and let so I can be happy and continue to live my life instead of saying that then the patient will count down that time or focus on it regardless how many positive things coming their way. Example we are able to buy groceries for Thanksgiving, and we have other things to be thankful for. But none of that matters to my mother. My brother and I want to decorate for Christmas but mother is scared for us to do that because she thinks that she is going to die (she thinks that this will be the last Christmas with us). I do not have anyone to talk to (no support) that is why I come on here. I just do not know what else to do.
I am so worried so much about a lot!!!!!
