I may or may not have lymphedema.

My older sister noticed my right arm was a bit swollen almost a year ago, and both her and my mom told me to see a doctor about it. I brushed it off cause I thought it was just because I have been playing games on my PC too much lately, and maybe in a few weeks it would go down, but it never did.
I did once briefly talked about it with a doctor, and told him I suspect it was because I game too much on my PC, hours and hours, everyday, just clicking intensely. He told me to quit gaming for a few weeks and see how that goes, if it doesn't go down then I should come see him again, I never quit and never went back.

Months later, doing some research online I found lymphedema, which seemed close to what I have, at least physicly. I also read it might be caused by cancer, which is scary, so I am afraid of actually finding out what's causing it, cause I don't wanna be put through the whole treatment for it and spend the rest of my days locked in a hospital, which were always sad to me. Also, there is a tiny, tiny, tiny, but very depressed part of me that hopes it's cancer and sees it as a quicker way to the inevitable end we all must face at some point, because I am just too exhausted from life to keep living...