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Sometimes I wonder, that even though people want you to talk...

silence is better than talking. It's difficult to explain, like while they expect you to talk, they enjoy you more when you're quiet.

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SwampFlower · 31-35, F

I have noticed this too. People always ask me why I am so quiet and then ignore me when I do speak. That is why, I'd rather save my energy.

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SwampFlower · 31-35, F

@Elessar I agree with your last sentence but my only friend is my therapist. And a couple here.

The problem is that people pour their souls out to me and then get angry or distant if I try to talk about myself at all.

Elessar · 26-30, M

@SwampFlower I've noticed that kind of reaction from people who can't really handle my [o]negativity[/i] (read: [i]refusing to see things positively when they're objectively not good[/i]).

I do have friends who can really listen to me and offer advice, but I don't want to overburden them either, so.. I can relate, somehow, I think.

🤗

SwampFlower · 31-35, F

@Elessar That's me, too. I've conditioned myself to not overwhelm the people willing to listen. There are just some things and feelings i have that will have to stay with me. Some of us are just too intense for this world to be purely authentic 🤷🏻‍♀️

hartfire

I think what most people want is to be heard.
So if one talks just enough to ask a few questions and mirror back their reality in brief, most are usually very happy.
Rare are the ones who are curious enough to ask, and good at an equal free flow.
Even rarer, those who are open to real discussion about ideas.

Mutual silence is actually quite an intimate thing - it takes a level of feeling comfortable and familiar with someone - having got past the words and being able to just be together.

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hartfire

@Dan193 Is it easier to be silent on SW?
Or is the written word just another form of noise?

Dan193 · 31-35, M

@hartfire Idk if it's easier, because we all want to vent sometimes, but nevertheless it is still better, because when you're the one being silent, you're allowing somebody else to vent.