Flat Earth proof #2. Proof of the flat Earth and the global flood...Or, was it a universal flood?

Indeed, renowned scientists agree that the Earth is flat or...In the words of Professor Nile deGrasse Tyson it is an 'oblong spear shaped haemorrhoid.' Well, the global flood would explain this. You see when the waters cascaded on to the flat Earth it turned it into a 'globe' type shape or, if you will an 'oblong haemorrhoid' which is much championed by Dr Mike Tyson.'

So why are all the other planets also globes? Well this is quite simple to explain, it is quite clear that they also had global floods and this turned them in to flat shaped spheres. The Sun must also have had a flood and this would have put it out for a while but a star must have hit it and lit it again...explaining everything.

Thoughts?