I just realized how stuck I was.

I was unemployed for months—almost a year. During that time, I was isolated, basically living a hikikomori life. I didn't go outside or socialize, not even online. The most I did was post on discussion groups. I had no contact with my college friends. I isolated myself out of shame and other stuff.

But now that I'm employed, I kinda got the courage to talk to a friend of mine from college. And it made me realize just how stuck I was. I talked to them, and you can really feel how much they've changed—how mature they've become—while I’m almost the same as I was back then.

I can also feel they don’t see me as a "friend" anymore. Like, sure, I was a friend to them last year, but it’s obvious they’ve moved on, made new friends, and lived life—while I’m still looking at them the same way I did back in college.

It really shows how stuck I’ve been. I feel like I didn’t grow at all during that span of time. I feel left behind.