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WillaKissing · 56-60, M
I had a son and daughter and lost my son to suicide when he was 21 years old in the Army. I had the Army as a career so that truly messed me up for a long while and I am still not and will never be over it.
But, Yes, I wished I had at least four children. My Ex-wife promised me four getting married, but she also promised love and fidelity and I did not get that either.
But I feel blessed I still have my daughter! And I could never replace my son, those are solid givens.
But, Yes, I wished I had at least four children. My Ex-wife promised me four getting married, but she also promised love and fidelity and I did not get that either.
But I feel blessed I still have my daughter! And I could never replace my son, those are solid givens.
WillaKissing · 56-60, M
@WowwGirl Thank you My sweet friend, God got me through it and has taught me how to cope with it.
WillaKissing · 56-60, M
@WowwGirl Ah, thank you. God made me extremely strong in heart, mind, and body. And sometimes I ask why but then defer to his infinite knowledge.
Three days post my son's death I gave his Eulogy in a church with 300+ guests and his entire Army unit from the Colonel down, met and shook all hands and after everyone left, I kissed my son and collapse prayed and went with my daughter his sister to eat dinner with my son's race car group at my son's favorite restaurant. Then drove home for two and a half hours with an Amish friend that came with me to the funeral home. The next day that Amish friend came to my home and we worked on the house I started to build for myself. I had to stop and let the Amish friend and his son to finish the day without me.
My son's wishes in his exit letter were to be cremated and to have his ashes spread on a hill like I want done with mine on the last farm I will ever own. Anyways the ex-wife could not make herself to go to that funeral home to pick his ashes up, so a week later I drove the two and a half hours to pick my son up and take him on his last ride with dear Ole Dad. And I drove with him over to my daughter that was at her horse barn where she had her horses boarded and handed Joey over to her for her last ride with Joey back to the mother's house. Visited and drove home alone crying and screaming and here I sit today type and crying and remembering all the good and love my son had in him that the world stole from us all.
Thank you deeply.
Three days post my son's death I gave his Eulogy in a church with 300+ guests and his entire Army unit from the Colonel down, met and shook all hands and after everyone left, I kissed my son and collapse prayed and went with my daughter his sister to eat dinner with my son's race car group at my son's favorite restaurant. Then drove home for two and a half hours with an Amish friend that came with me to the funeral home. The next day that Amish friend came to my home and we worked on the house I started to build for myself. I had to stop and let the Amish friend and his son to finish the day without me.
My son's wishes in his exit letter were to be cremated and to have his ashes spread on a hill like I want done with mine on the last farm I will ever own. Anyways the ex-wife could not make herself to go to that funeral home to pick his ashes up, so a week later I drove the two and a half hours to pick my son up and take him on his last ride with dear Ole Dad. And I drove with him over to my daughter that was at her horse barn where she had her horses boarded and handed Joey over to her for her last ride with Joey back to the mother's house. Visited and drove home alone crying and screaming and here I sit today type and crying and remembering all the good and love my son had in him that the world stole from us all.
Thank you deeply.