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Question for everyone how would you respond to this message from your friend?

Background I have a messenger chat with my three really good friends and the four of us talk about everything on a daily basis. We have been like this for about seven years now.

My friend K posted on her public Facebook profile page yesterday that she was diagnosed with breast cancer and has to start radiation immediately. I commented on that post, but then I sent her a message in our group chat. We are all friends with her on the Facebook page so everyone’s going to see it.

In my message in our group chat, I said K I’m really sorry to hear this, let me know if there’s anything I can do etc. etc.

She sent me a private message on messenger and says that she’s not comfortable talking about it in our group chat and that she’d rather talk about it privately with me. I’m

I thought that’s really weird and I was a little taken aback because the four of us talk about everything. we all knew she was going for her mammogram and there aren’t many secrets between the four of us. Plus, why would she post it publicly if she’s not comfortable talking about it in our group chat

I haven’t replied to her yet and I’m just wondering what any of you think about this. Do you think it’s strange or should I just like not be concerned about it?

It brings me back to a really good friend. I had who went on a trip to Malta with her boyfriend and came back called me the next morning and we talked for almost an hour, and she told me all about the trip, but she did not tell me they got engaged. An hour later, as she posts her wedding ring on her hand on her Facebook page and tells everyone that he asked her to marry him while they were in Malta.

It’s weird I don’t understand women sometimes lol
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FlowersInHerHair · 56-60, F
She may be scattered at the moment. It’s a lot to take in. Maybe there are private conversations she wants to have with each of you…or she may not want it private. Blasting the info out is odd. It may be about wanting everyone to know without misinformation being spread about her.

It’s a tough thing for friends to process when you are so close. I wish I had a definitive answer.
Adogslife · 61-69, M
With a scary diagnosis, I’d give her the space to share as she pleases. How she shares seems trivial.
Jenny1234 · 56-60, F
@Adogslife I agree. you’re right. It’s just confusing for me why she would post it publicly. Her Facebook page isn’t even private. It’s a public one because she also has a business so her personal page is combined with her business page if that makes sense. So the post, even though it may be very sensitive and personal to her, has been made very public. I’m just confused.
Adogslife · 61-69, M
@Jenny1234 That’s understandable. Just let her find her way. That’s the best friend you can be.
DeWayfarer · 61-69, M
People are all different. Hard to assign reasoning, without long term associations.

You would have a better idea of her reasoning, than anyone on this site, with such a years long association.

Likely I wouldn't make much of it though, unless it really somehow affected me. Does this somehow affect you? Only you can answer that.
Nightwings · F
I think she posted it publicly because she felt like she had to let people know officially, but it's so scary that she's uncomfortable talking with too many people about it. She wants to talk to someone that she trusts to not make her more anxious than she already is.
Harmonium1923 · 56-60, M
You and the rest of us! I never understood the urge to post personal medical info on (non-anonymous) social media.
GoFish ·
who knows but i agree that was strange and thoughtless of them a bit rude really 😳 i had a friend that had some sort of health problem and never told anyone i guess she was just proud and didn't want sympathy .. anyway sorry she got on your nerves with her seemingly irrational behavior that doesn't make any sense 😳 😫 annoying people ah well 😒
JimboSaturn · 56-60, M
It doesn't really make sense to me but as Adogslife said, it's scary and maybe she is not being rational. Maybe she just wants to make the post to the world to let them know but doesn't want to discuss it further in a public way.

Give her some grace.
OldBrit · 61-69, M
Given she's put it on her public Facebook profile seems odd to the say she wants to not discuss it with her friends.

I don't get it either personally
MellyMel22 · F
Maybe she wants the private attention from you all or doesn’t want to have everyone at once feeling sorry for her? Though she posted it on fb so idk.
pdockal · 56-60, M
Do you think we understand them ?
It's confusing. 🤷
Sequoia51 · 70-79, M
Any Man that says he understands women will lie about other things ...

 
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