Do you have a racist bone in your body?
The other day I thought I heard my shin say a slur, but he might've just been saying "bigger"...
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4meAndyou · F
The whole issue is very painful for me. When I was little I lived in a totally white neighborhood. I think I was three or four years old and the first black person I had ever seen came into our church, and I said, (at the top of my lungs, of course), "Mommy! That man is purple!" Of course they hushed me right up.
Our neighborhood integrated slowly, and I didn't understand that there was a difference. I used to play with a black child who lived just over the town line in the next town over. And my first boyfriend was a young man from Pakistan.
The reactions of my racist relatives out west when I went back there every summer hurt me horribly and confused me. I knew my friends were wonderful people, and I loved them but the things one or two of my cousins said to me were excruciating.
So now I have this weird dichotomy of emotion...the love I used to feel combined with the shame I was made to feel. It just sucks.
Our neighborhood integrated slowly, and I didn't understand that there was a difference. I used to play with a black child who lived just over the town line in the next town over. And my first boyfriend was a young man from Pakistan.
The reactions of my racist relatives out west when I went back there every summer hurt me horribly and confused me. I knew my friends were wonderful people, and I loved them but the things one or two of my cousins said to me were excruciating.
So now I have this weird dichotomy of emotion...the love I used to feel combined with the shame I was made to feel. It just sucks.