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GeniUs · 56-60, M
A man has a girlfriend called Wendy and sex with her is so good he decides to get her name tattooed on his penis, he gets it done but is a little disappointed that when he's not excited he can only see 'Wy'. One day he's in a pub and goes to the toilet and an Afro Caribbean man uses the urinal at the same time, he looks across and sees the same letters 'Wy' tattooed on his cock, so he says to him, 'do you know Wendy too?'
'No, why do you ask?'
'The letters on your cock.'
'Oh no,' he replied, 'I use to work for the Caribbean tourist board, my tattoo says, 'Welcome to Jamaica, I hope you have a lovely day'
'No, why do you ask?'
'The letters on your cock.'
'Oh no,' he replied, 'I use to work for the Caribbean tourist board, my tattoo says, 'Welcome to Jamaica, I hope you have a lovely day'
AliceTinker · 51-55, F
A nun is sitting in a bath, all of a sudden there's a knock on the door and a man shouts " Can I come in ? "
The nun answers " No my child I am in the bath "
The man answers " It's ok, I'm the blind man "
The nun replies "That's ok then, please come in "
The man walks in and says " Nice tits, where do you want the blinds ? "
The nun answers " No my child I am in the bath "
The man answers " It's ok, I'm the blind man "
The nun replies "That's ok then, please come in "
The man walks in and says " Nice tits, where do you want the blinds ? "
GreenGoddess · F
I don't know about absolute funniest ever but this one's pretty good.
A woman walks into a shoestore and asks the clerk for some assistance trying on shoes. The clerk helps her try on serveral pairs, biting his tongue everytime she uncrossed her legs as she was very attractive and wearing a short skirt. Eventually he couldn't keep his mouth shut any longer and blurted out "I want to fill your pussy with ice cream and eat it all." The woman ran outside, horrified. Locating her husband she ran over to him screaming "Honey, that shoe salesman just told me he wanted to fill my pussy with ice cream and eat it all! Go kick his ass!" Her husband took a step back and replied "Baby, anyone who can eat that much ice cream, I ain't fucking with."
A woman walks into a shoestore and asks the clerk for some assistance trying on shoes. The clerk helps her try on serveral pairs, biting his tongue everytime she uncrossed her legs as she was very attractive and wearing a short skirt. Eventually he couldn't keep his mouth shut any longer and blurted out "I want to fill your pussy with ice cream and eat it all." The woman ran outside, horrified. Locating her husband she ran over to him screaming "Honey, that shoe salesman just told me he wanted to fill my pussy with ice cream and eat it all! Go kick his ass!" Her husband took a step back and replied "Baby, anyone who can eat that much ice cream, I ain't fucking with."
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
Not necessarily the funniest but just seen dude tell a girl she didn't have cunt she had a can't. Just seen it right before your question
SW-User
"Why do people say 'grow some balls', balls are weak and sensitive. If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding!"
~Betty White~
~Betty White~
SandInMyShoes · 36-40, F
[media=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ienp4J3pW7U]
Zeusdelight · 61-69, M
A horse walks into a bar. Barman says "Why the long face?"
GeniUs · 56-60, M
@Zeusdelight A bear follows him
GeniUs · 56-60, M
...big paws
Abbenthewarwolf · 18-21, M
IDK