I'm just so sick of the same
Every day I wake up and have no energy whatsoever. I wake up feeling more tired than I went to bed. I almost never feel well-rested, no matter how much sleep I get.
I plan out all the things I need or want to get done in a day. Usually it's pretty basic. "Clean the dishes, pick up trash, run this errand, etc." It's a good day if I manage to accomplish even one thing on my list. I become deeply stressed when I believe my every day routine is going to be affected, such as on trips/vacations or if there is even just a busy day planned where I won't be home much. Basically more than one planned thing a day is overwhelming to me.
I usually spend the day entirely drained of energy, finding it too difficult to do even simple things like get myself water or shower. I end up just sitting on the couch or in bed on my phone. If it's a good day I might be able to read a little or watch some of a show. If it's a bad day I might spend it terrified and lost in psychosis or flashbacks or any other related fun things.
Every day there is so much I want to do. I want to be productive. I want to keep a clean apartment and keep up with my responsibilities. I want to cook for myself instead of being dependent on takeout. I want to work out and take care of my body. I want to have a job so I can have money again. I want to do things I like too, like play videogames, study new languages, and do creative things like write or draw. But every day I function on -292882 energy, and even the smallest tasks are daunting and overwhelming as a result.
It's extremely frustrating. It feels like my life was stolen from me by my disabilities sometimes. I have always really fought hard against them and did my best not to let them define me, I have 2 bachelor's degrees and did well in my profession for the brief time I was able to maintain it. But nowadays it feels like my functioning is at an all time low and I'll never get to where I want to be.
I plan out all the things I need or want to get done in a day. Usually it's pretty basic. "Clean the dishes, pick up trash, run this errand, etc." It's a good day if I manage to accomplish even one thing on my list. I become deeply stressed when I believe my every day routine is going to be affected, such as on trips/vacations or if there is even just a busy day planned where I won't be home much. Basically more than one planned thing a day is overwhelming to me.
I usually spend the day entirely drained of energy, finding it too difficult to do even simple things like get myself water or shower. I end up just sitting on the couch or in bed on my phone. If it's a good day I might be able to read a little or watch some of a show. If it's a bad day I might spend it terrified and lost in psychosis or flashbacks or any other related fun things.
Every day there is so much I want to do. I want to be productive. I want to keep a clean apartment and keep up with my responsibilities. I want to cook for myself instead of being dependent on takeout. I want to work out and take care of my body. I want to have a job so I can have money again. I want to do things I like too, like play videogames, study new languages, and do creative things like write or draw. But every day I function on -292882 energy, and even the smallest tasks are daunting and overwhelming as a result.
It's extremely frustrating. It feels like my life was stolen from me by my disabilities sometimes. I have always really fought hard against them and did my best not to let them define me, I have 2 bachelor's degrees and did well in my profession for the brief time I was able to maintain it. But nowadays it feels like my functioning is at an all time low and I'll never get to where I want to be.
